Ex wants me back but I'm hung up on other guy?

so I'm so confused right now. in very tough situation. OK, so I dated this one guy for five months last year. really fell for the guy but he wasn't ready to settle down and was kind of a player. I broke it off with him, even changed my number Because he kept calling when I broke up Because all of a sudden he thought he wanted me and me only and I felt like he was just full of crap. anyway, ended up meeting a guy on match this past fall. like me, he was divorced except he was still going through custody issues major issues (kids moved out of state with mom he is fighting for more rights it is bitter fight). anyway, we dated just under two months which I know is a very short time but I fell for him and I am pretty certain he felt same about me. anyway, we ended up having a disagreement and I sent a mean text and that was it we were done. but then he wrote two weeks after I sent it and apologized for his part and said he had feelings for me was just depressed and mad about the custody stuff and needed to focus on that but wanted to keep seeing me after he had things set up and that he was going to call me blah blah blah. anyway, so I kinda feel I still have chance with him. here's the thing, I know I need to date and move on Because I can't wait for the guy to get his issues together esp Because who knows if he still feels that way. and it's been over a month since he said all that. and now my ex is back in pic he sent me roses and said he is in love with me and wants to be with me. part of me wld give him a chance but he is so serious right now and I am not there...i wldn't mind a date but I think he may take it as meaning more. and at end of day I'm not over the other guy...despite going on dates and having multiple guys pursuing me I can't stop thinking about that guy. I'm not usually like this I hate this stuff lol. any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If you thought he was ind of a player, well, he, probably is, and probably won't change. So stay away from him in spite of whatever line he gives you and roses and all.

    The other guy, well, it's up to you how long you want to wait, but a month doesn't seem long given the complexities of a custody fight; naturally that leaves him depressed and not feeling very secure about women in general. I'm surprised you're not more patient since you're divorced yourself, you know how it is.

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    • i'm so glad you said what you did...i really want to hold out and be with him. I'm not jumping into anything else but it's hard because it's no contact right now and I feel insecure and wonder if he feels the same way. I'm just scared. I've been hurt before and I feel such a connection with the guy and know he is going through so much rt now and I respect that I'm just afraid that I will keep waiting for someone who may never wanna come back. I miss him.

    • Show All
    • Yes, you won't regret it.

      Isn't this the best answer?

    • ha, yes it was! just clicked best answer (and still haven't worked up the nerve lol)

What Guys Said 2

  • My advice would be that you have LOTS of chemistry with the guy but nothing of substance that would keep the relationship humming along without a LOT of drama. From your description the guy was going through a divorce and a player. I would suggest if you ever wanted something long term he is probably not the guy for it. I am sure you have strong feelings for him, we all have those people in our past, but that doesn't mean he is a logical long term guy. I would dump the other ex too. If something doesn't work with someone the first time, it will almost always fail the second time. It is best to just start from scratch and leave the past in the past.

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  • toss ...head / tale

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