I'm thinking about "disappearing" for a little while to get her stirred up.

Long story short, a good friend of mine came to my apt today to bring me some food she bought for me. We laid on the bed and played vid games. Eventually it led to playing around, her smacking me and calling me names, and me grabbing her and pulling her around. Eventually, she called me out of my name so I challenged her that if she does it again that I would touch the first thing I c...her boobs. She laughed and said it again so I grabbed them and she laughed and tried to push me away. Then after a few minutes she did it again so I repeated. Then as we were laying down, we started playing so I grabbed her panties and she started smacking me and laughing. Then I decided to rush kiss her...after that she got a little upset and told me that she didn't want me to do that. So I said OK, you only have to tell me once. She then told me that its not me its her and that I can do anything else but that. I said fine don't worry about it then. So then before she left, she told me is it OK that she calls me later and are we still going to be close because she doesn't want this to affect how close we are to each other. I looked at her nonchalantly and told her it wont. She asked me to walk to her car but then I told her I was in a rush to go to work and that I can't. So then she asked for a hug and when I gave her one, she told me that it wasn't my real hug and I was giving her a fake hug. I told her to drive safely and that's it.

Honestly, I'm thinking about "disappearing" for a little while to get her stirred up. I'm doing this because I don't want to appear clingy and I want her to think about what happened. But my question is why did she get upset about the kiss as opposed to groping etc?

Updates:
Im still taking more opinions on this. Best answer will be marked as best answer by tonight

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Most Helpful Girl

  • She has feelings for you. She doesn't want the friendship that you have to be screwed up by messing around. And when you kiss her, it brings those feelings that she has for you to a boil. She's trying to keep you close, so she can get as much of you as she can, but she doesn't want it to turn into a kind of relationship where there's sex expected all the time.

    I went through this almost exact same thing a couple years ago. I had a friend that I hung out with ALL the time, he had become one of my best friends quickly, and then I started to like him a lot, but I didn't approach that because I cared more about our friendship than anything else at that point. We did eventually hook up, and it f***ed with my head big time. We were still good friends, but it just made me so confused.

    I think leaving her alone for a little while is a good idea. It'll give her time to realize that she can't lead you to think it's okay, and the next second be scolding you for it.

    Deep down, she really wants something more with you, and it felt good for her to have you grab her like that, but when you kissed her, it opened a whole can of worms that'll f*** sh*t up for both of you.

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    • So you recommend leaving her alone for how long? because she usually calls me like every other day. Usually when I talk to her, I flirt some, I let her talk about her day and then I get off the phone because I don't want to be her "buddy" or I may actually have something to do. I like her tho but I was confused on why she doesn't mind me touching her as opposed to kissing. I guess when I talk again I will be nonchalant but I won't give her a lot of my time...hopefully to get her to think of me more

What Girls Said 2

  • if you do 'disappear' for a while, the more she is gnna think about what had happened. and I don't think that's a good idea, it'll just confuse her. I don't understand myself why she didn't mind the groping but you couldn't kiss her but then I guess she thought you were messing around and a kiss may mean something to her and that she would only share it with someone special. Just be normal and try to forget the situation happened. if you are close friends don't ruin the friendship over a little incident. :)

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  • I had no idea. She could of just been testing you out, the kiss was too much. It meant it had to go that way. She sounds confused. play it cool for a few days.

    She might also just really value you as a friend and doesn't want to lose you?!

    People who break up rarely can keep the friendship.

    Lay low and let her think things over.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Because she likes to be a **** tease, but doesn't want to get involved. Disappearing may be a decent option depending on how you do it.

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