Is it a bad sign that we can't relax around each other?

The guy I'm interested and I both tend to act pretty nervous around each other. I know that's probably most because we like each other (at least I think he likes me back!), but I'm wondering at what point it's a bad sign? I don't want to be with someone I can't relax around.

How long did it take you to be able to relax around your SO? How did you transition from the awkward I-like-you-do-you-like-me-too stage to a comfortable romantic relationship?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • For me is very natural to be nervous around someone that I have just met and I like. I am so concentrated in trying to make a good impression that I can't be myself. Once I to get to know her, spend some time with her, laugh with her, and share some stories, I am no longer nervous.

    If you are still nervous after spending 5 or 6 dates it means you guys are not compatible and you might never be comfortable around them. You can use to it but not very comfortable with it.

    So it probably depends on how long the nervousness last, if it lasted too long then it's a sign that you guys cannot relax around each other.

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    • Yeah, I guess I don't think we've reached the point of no return quite yet, but I'm wondering at what point it does become a compatibility issue, not just a phase.

    • i don't think 5 or 6 dates is a good way of looking at it. it takes different people different amounts of time. plus there are other factors. what else is going on in your life. if u've had misunderstandings. If your bot accustomed to being attracted to someone..

      The guy I'm with now.. it took us bout 3 years. Granted we had maybe equal to 5 dates-i don't date, so I'm estimating how much one on one time we had- intimately.

      it was incredibly awkward- I hated that. But I was/ am in love with him.

    • it took you three years to get over feeling awkward around him? :(

What Guys Said 5

  • Just assume he likes you too, the odds are pretty strong he does. I'd up and kiss him, just to clear the air and settle yu both down.

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    • We've already kissed, actually... and I slept over once. but things are still pretty up in the air... It's a kind of weird situation :S

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    • yeah, maybeeeee!

    • This has to be the best answer by now!

  • Im usually instantly relaxed around ppl...but then again I may be an outlier in that regard.

    It's usually my calming presence that calms her down.

    Now with your situation...this guy must be VEEEEEEERY shy, which sux cauz he's not giving undeniable evidence that he likes you.

    Honestly, he wouldn't hang out with you a lot if he didn't like you.

    I say that you should "take the reins" on this situation to transition to the comfortable romantic stage. Break the touch barrier if you haven't already.

    Have you broken the touch barrier yet, QA?

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    • yeah--we kissed and I slept over (no sex) about two months ago, but we had a really long break inbetween then and now

  • yep its bad.. even if you did hook up you'd have to figure out how to relax. his best bet is to be the man and stop being nervous around you.

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    • Lol it's not bad. If anything, it would be an indication that his heart is in the right place.

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    • yeah let's just ignore this answer, guys.

    • *sigh* wimps like kain will never understand girls will he.

  • No way it's definitely a sign that he likes you haha.

    Just keep talking about interests and stuff. try to joke around. play board games to break the ice. How do you feel when you two kiss? is it awkward or nice?

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    • We haven't kissed since... geeze, like, over two months ago. It was an awkward situation in which we kissed, but actually kissing him was f***ing great. I hope he liked it, cause I definitely did.

    • I would suggest going out with him somewhere. I think you two need to distract yourselves from thinking and start doing things. Because what happened when you kissed? you weren't thinking 'gee this is awkward' wer e you? So yeah. go do something fun together. bowling, go to a bar, take a walk together. play video games or board games. something so that you aren't thinking 'awkwardness' and instead thinking 'wow this is fun, or sweet.'

    • point taken. thaaanks.

  • just takes time to relax and get to know each other better...

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What Girls Said 1

  • It's natura!

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