Online dating sites: worth it?

are they worth it? I tried match . com for free just to see the kind of girls on there and to my surprise there's a lot of really hot girls on there. but in order to really see what's happening you need to upgrade to the full version and pay monthly fees that are a little costly for me at the moment. I need to find a job. I left my last job and have been searching for the last couple months for a new one.

anyways it says there is a girl interested in me, and someone favorited my profile, but I can't tell who or how hot the girl is lol. is online dating really worth it? thanks!

Updates:
could everyone read my response to bobair and let me know your thoughts on it as well? thanks!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I've had luck online finding someone. I think it really depends on the person. Some people have an easy time, while others have no luck at all. I was in the middle. It took me 8 months to find my boyfriend. We have been together now for over a year.

    There are definitely some challenges to online dating. A lot of people think it's desperate, or stupid or that there are only creepers online or crazy people. Yes you will probably run into some of that, but that is where the delete and block buttons come in handy. You have to take what you read from those people with a grain of salt. Some people go on there just to mess with people. Other people are too afraid to actually ever meet up with anyone and then they wonder why they can't meet people.

    You really have to just use it as another tool in the dating game. Don't be afraid to make a profile, but then still go out. It definitely gives you exposure to people who you would otherwise have never met.

    That was my issue, I kept meeting the same kinds of people. And they weren't what I wanted. So I went online and I found my SO :)

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What Girls Said 6

  • @Update: I say if you have nothing else to do, I would meet up with her and talk. At least then you are going out and meeting people. And then pose the idea of a friendship with her if you are 100% sure of not wanting anything other than friendship. She will probably be more understanding to friendship if you have met her and then were not interested, vs only knowing her online and not wanting anything more.

    It's hard to know if you are doing anything wrong or not because we don't have many details about what you are actually doing. It takes time to find someone. And you have to put effort into finding someone, even if it's online dating. Update your profile once in a while. Have an interesting headline and updated pictures that are easy to see who you are in the picture (ie. None in a big group of guys and say "I'm the tall one" when clearly they are all tall). Girls do that stuff too by the way online and I think it's probably one of the most annoying things. Or having pics from 6 years ago. You may be 22 now, but I don't care what you looked like when you were 17. You have probably changed.

    If you are looking for a relationship it can take a while. It took me 8 months to find my boyfriend. I sent out messages to a bunch of different people. Some guys only sent me a "Hey Whatsup?". While others would actually read my profile and pick out details. This might sound picky but I always gave the guys who sent me detailed responses a priority. They were proving that they were serious about finding someone, and I found that most of the time I was right. The guys who sent the small messages weren't the type I liked anyway.

    The problem with online dating is that anyone can make a profile, but not everyone maintains them or puts effort into it. They might have made a dating profile online just for fun, and then forgot about it. So you could be sending messages to people who never check it or are not even single anymore (even though they have a profile still).

    I wouldn't let that discourage you, even though I know the feeling. I sent out tons of messages too without a guy messaging me back. But you just have to remind yourself that you will eventually find someone.

    I know that's frustrating, but that is the way it is. I got some weird messages too. But I was the one who messaged my boyfriend, and we have been dating for over a year now :)

    I used Plenty of Fish too!

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    • well I'm very serious about meeting a nice girl. it's all over my profile, though I don't jump right out and say it. it's not that I'm not interested. I just know that girls don't respond well to desperation so I don't want to give off that vibe. it's not that I didn't read their profile.

  • I really don't like the formality of those sites. I would MUCH prefer to meet someone in person where I can see their mannerisms and their body language and really just talk to them first before getting into the dating mindset.

    With online dating tho, I definitely think that it depends a lot on where you live. If you llive in a less populated area, your selection is going to be poor as opposed to the selection you would find in a larger city.

    Despite what I've said, I'd say that using a dating site is worth a shot, especially if you are in a situation where you aren't able to meet different people of the opposite gender or just don't have time.

    OR...if you are looking for something specific. I.e. sugardaddy/sugarbaby, gay/lesbian, fetish, people of a certain religion or interest group etc etc

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    • Did it really just change "sex" to "gender"? Wouldn't that be politically incorrect?

  • try plenty of fish or okcupid

    theyre both free, completely

    i prefer plenty of fish

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  • NO, they all suck and it's all phony! People hide who they are behind a computer.

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  • No, I wouldn't think they're worth it. I've heard of a lot of people who have tried the online dating websites and they didn't go good. HOWEVER! I met my boyfriend on an online game, and we really hit it off and live with each other irl after being together for 4 years. :) You should try that maybe? You get the enjoyment from games and meet a significant other - what beats this?! nothing! :P

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  • Nope I personally would not trust them

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What Guys Said 9

  • I was always a big fan of plenty of fish.. it's free and very popular!

    But if you want to be good at online dating you need to practice being good at dating on the street... flirting at coffee shops, the running stairs by the bridge, choosing fruit at the grocery store, etc.

    It takes almost zero effort so how can it NOT be worth it?

    Is there some EASIER way of meeting women I'm not aware of?

    :P

    ~ Robby

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    • I just got a message from a girl I'm not really interested in, but I want to try to be open to new friends too. now I also have sent out some messages to a few attractive girls but I didn't make it anything like the girls that messaged me. I didn't want to say to much or anything so I just said "hey how are you?" or "what's up?" but this girl messaged me like a brief paragraph. am I doing something wrong? I don't know the "rules" of online dating.

    • Show All
    • My website is having server problems this week, but you can still peek at an old article I wrote outline some good basic online dating advice: link

    • so basically I already screwed up with these girls I messaged? sucks because they're the most attractive ones. what if I emailed them again after a few days and told them I'm new to this lol

  • NO!

    More often than not, there are thousands of fakers out there. These websites hire men to create fake profiles of women just to get you to join their club and spend money on them. Also, they don't guarantee any sort of success with women, only that you should try harder. If you think women are picky in person, they are far worse on the internet because they can. They may SAY someone is interested in you but it is true?

    Internet dating is no different from in-person dating. If you are hot, then you should have no problems. If you are not, God help you.

    There was a time when this stuff was legit, but not anymore. I just wouldn't waste your time nor your money. Many people are experiencing the horrors of online dating now. Trust me on this

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  • There are upsides and downsides to online dating. If you know what you're doing it's easy. Stick to the free sites, plentyoffish is the best one I think.

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  • OkCupid is amazing, and anyone not on there is just limiting themselves. But it's something you have to put effort into, if you just expect to throw up an empty profile and get dates then you'll be in for a lot of disappointment.

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  • try okcupid, I've heard good things about it

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    • it's free right?

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    • what are effective ways to message girls? I want to come off interesting and all. whatever is most likely to get a reply.

    • honestly man, I have no idea, your guess is as good as mine, if not better

  • Well remember, photos can be altered or even fake. People look a lot different in person than they do in pictures. I never tried online dating and never will. I just don't trust it enough.

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  • Watch out. A lot of sites use loads of fake profiles to pull you in. Give plenty of fish .com a try at least it's free.

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  • Met my girlfriend on okcupid, so I guess I can suggest that :)

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  • It's tough. I'm trying one right now and I'm a decent looking dude with a good profile, I think. I always read the girl's profile and send her a message based on something she's written - showing I'm generally interested in her. I almost never get a response. I think most girls are looking for a hot guy on there or really aren't serious... either way, don't waste your time. Or cut and paste a line in the message.

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    • same here. like I'm not the hottest dude by any means. don't look like a model, but good looking still. good profile yes. some girls appear serious. that's the funny thing with girls though, so many of them act serious but when it comes down to it, they really aren't.

    • contrary to what girls tell you, cut and paste a canned response. reading their profile will waste time... when you get a girl snagged then you can check it out. I almost never get a response by trying..

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