Help! Is this a big NO NO or okay?

Okay so I've been friends with this guy on Facebook for a couple of years now that I had a fling with about 7 years ago. He started talking to a girl after me and got her pregnant so they got married...some time later separated for a while, got back together had another kid and now it appears they're separated again. He has deleted her from Facebook and she's been going out partying. He commented on my status lastnight and gave me his number and is "wanting to get together" this coming weekend. Is it wrong of me if I hang out with him since he is seperated from his wife? I'm not trying to get a crazy woman on me but at the same time we used to be friends too. I'm stuck on it because I know for sure it's wrong if he was still with her but if they're not living in the same house and she's going out partying all of the time now...?

Updates:
Okay...I said it in one of the messages below...I'm not trying to get in a relationship with him or be a step mom or anything like that...I'm surprised by the answers though! I figured people would be like NOOOOOOOOO lol that makes me feel better! Thanks!

0|0
5|4

Most Helpful Guy

  • meh nah it's ok.

    1|0
    0|0
    • why do you say it's ok? Just wondering the reasoning...

    • Look if she's partying all the time, she's going to clubs. Clubs have one purpose: To hook up. They're seperated so she can do that, he can do that too if he wants.

      Besides it's just to hang out no big deal

    • Good reasoning! Thanks!

What Guys Said 3

  • Right or wrong, I don't know, but he does not seem like a family, or relationship kind of guy if he has been together, and separated with a girl several times, and got her pregnant. I would not recommend you to go after a guy like that.

    0|0
    0|0
    • Well...it's not just the guys fault usually when a girl gets pregnant. A girl should know how to protect herself too. This is the 2nd time they've separated and they're married so the second child was born in wedlock. I'm not looking to date him or anything...we've known each other for a long time so I'm not "going after" him. Thanks though!

  • Definitely wrong, just come meet up with me instead :)

    If they are separated (which it sounds like they are) then it is okay - you are doing nothing wrong. Sounds like it could be a bit complicated though as they have already split up and got back together plus as they have kids they will be seeing each other again because of that. I'd say go for it as long as you are confident he is over her and their relationship is finished or you would be okay with something short term if they got back together.

    0|0
    0|0
    • i won't be so sure he's over the ex; whose knows maybe soon they'll back together again and impregnat her for kid #3

      The guy probably is lonely and needs a friend who knows him (well) or he's simply just horney and needs someone to fill his needs. Better yet he thinks he's ready to move on, this I would give a benefit of doubts...

    • He's been with her for 7 years...of course he's not over her and their decisions are their decisions. He literally quit talking to me(we were never in a relationship though) and found her and the next thing we know she's pregnant and he does what most people think is the right thing and marries her. We've got mutual friends though and he does need support right now. He even had a special friend to pass away about a month ago so times are tough for him.

  • They're separated, not divorced. There is a difference. Don't be "the other woman"

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 5

  • okay, if your motive is genuine or just want to be nice to a friend in need, why not? We all need someone sometimes in our lives...

    But, whether you want to hook-up with him again or not, just tread lightly and slowly. Remember he has 2 kids and comes with a lots of baggages. Guard your heart well and listen to your intuition always.

    Good luck.

    1|0
    0|0
    • There are no romantic/relationship feelings for him so the heart will only be in play as a friend. I mean I can't sit and say that nothing would happen because I was with him years ago but no relationship then either, but I can honestly say that I'm not looking ahead and planning for something to happen! I'm just trying to be a nice person considering everything. Thanks!

  • No, there's nothing wrong with it as long as they're separated. Although be prepared for drama even if you are just going to be friends with him. She may get the wrong impression of what's going on and bring you into the drama.

    1|0
    0|0
    • Totally agree...that's why I added her as a friend to Facebook YEARS ago so she would see that I'm not trying to go after him. lol and I understand why because I was with him before her but I'm not sure of what she knows either. But I do agree! Thanks!

  • I don't see the problem. If he is separated from her then it shouldn't matter what he does. As long as he's honest about the fact that he's separated then it's perfectly fine. It's really not even nearly a no no, so don't worry and enjoy :)

    1|0
    0|0
  • Well there's nothing wrong with seeing him if he's separated. But why would you want to? It doesn't sound like he genuinely cares about you. This whole thing could get messy very easily and you're the one who would most likely get hurt in the end.

    1|0
    0|0
    • We were friends back in the day...we had fun when we hung out before we ever hooked up back then. I'm a friendly person and try to keep the peace with everyone...even ex hook ups lol I'm not looking for a relationship with him or anything though because I'm not trying to be a step mom...

    • Go for it then. Have fun.

  • its ok.

    1|0
    0|0
Loading...