Agree? Disagree? Opinions?

“Don’t spend your time on and give your heart to any guy [or girl] who makes you wonder about anything related to his [or her] feelings for you”

--Greg Behrendt, He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys

Do you agree? Disagree? Does this take place from the very beginning of the dating period, or is it relevant after a few dates?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • to a certain extent I guess. if you barely know them then its natural to wonder if they feel the same at the beginning. if its been a few months and your still not sure then ya, they're not worth it. otherwise they would be making the same effort towards u.

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    • But after a few months, you're already getting attached. So you think this rule only applies after a few dates?

    • ya. if you've known them for a couple months and your still uncertain if they like you in the same way then they probably don't. unless they're real shy I guess

What Guys Said 1

  • The way I understand is - you're supposed to show interest to someone who is unclear about her feelings to you?

    I disagree about it.

    Although the talk is about "feelings" which means later phases, still dating someone who isn't clear whether or not she even likes you and is all flaky is just a waste of time.

    Those are the same mindgames.

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    • The quote means don't show interest if you're unsure about THEIR feelings. So I guess you'd agree with that.

    • Well, to your interpretation I agree.. but that original saying is so vague.. almost like made that way intentionally, to sound "smart"

What Girls Said 1

  • If you're already with them I agree.

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    • But that's so vague. What do you consider "with them"? One date? Three? Or at the point where you have titles/commitments?

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    • I disagree. I think people are so optimistic and hopeful that no, they can't tell when they're being jerked around. After all, how can you tell the difference between a shy guy and a jerk, if the jerk is TRYING to string you along?

    • Well that's where all the personal stuff comes in, that's why you need advice from people you can trust, who know you and have a general understanding about the partner. You can't really break it all down here, it's way too personalised, all situations have their little details - those are the ones we struggle to tell apart, not the easy ones like a 30 year old dating a 15 year old, etc. Also depends on how much a person knows themselves to tell it apart, esp if they've been through it before.

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