Why did he not pay? Was this not a date?

So a fairly confident but still slightly shy guy asked me if I was free to do something with him this week. However, I'm not sure if he knows that I quite like him so he never actually used the word 'date'. We went for a walk which was really nice but then when it came to food and the cinema he didn't offer to pay?! does this me he was not looking on it as being a date?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well did you offer to cover his meal?

    Men paying is a tradition started hundred years ago, when women didn't have money to pay for themselves because they weren't allowed to get jobs, or the jobs they did have didn't pay much and were just for show.

    Now that we have mostly equal rights, now that we have jobs that are pretty much equal to men, now that we are demanding independence we can't expect men to pay for us. We don't hold the same role we did in the early 20th century so we can't expect the same customs.

    Now, who asked whom on the date? If you asked him then why didn't you offer? You wanted the date. If he asked you he probably just didn't think of it, which is a little impolite but not a big deal.

    You're not entitled to that treatment, it's a gift that men are allowed to give or not give. You sound very entitled and there's no reason behind it.


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What Guys Said 2

  • It may be that, or maybe he's just an ass. Learn from this: the next time some guy asks you out, just come right out and ask him, "Are you asking me out on a date, or just as friends?"

  • Paying for the meal or the cinema has nothing to do about dating! Probably He was shy about showing it as a date, do not worry about it and show him that you are interested.


What Girls Said 1

  • Drop him. Any guy who asks you out and doesn't offer to pay is a real loser