We went on 5 dates and then he just stopped?

We went on 5 amazing dates..I foolishly slept with him on date number 3 & 5. I thought we had something going but then he just stopped..he said he was busy & distance was an issue because I live about 40mins away. But did he just want sex and not a relationship? So once he got laid he didn't need to take me out anymore?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Word from the wise:

    People that are worth having in your life will stand the test of time.

    Establish some sexual boundaries and stand by them. If your partner violates those boundaries, dump them immediately! If they violate your boundaries now, they will violate other boundaries down the road. Believe me!

    If your partner tells you that they supposedly "Love You" why not make them prove it to you by refraining from sex, including sleeping over which will eventually lead to sex until you are married? Establish those boundaries and watch how many of them stick around. Men are different animals then women are. We think about sexual matters all the time and when we are very young, we will unknowingly say anything to have sex. (Don't fall for it!)

    I too was a young man once and I have had my share of sex outside the context of marriage. It eventually cost me some consequences that I have spent a lifetime paying. First we have sex, eventually someone gets pregnant and maybe we move in together or get married. Then we find out that we're not sure we belong and so what happens? We get divorced and now we have a broken family and legalities come into play like child support and visitation. Not to mention the new spouses that we have to contend with that our ex's have invited into the picture.

    Don't think it can't happen to you because it can and will if you continue sleeping with dates outside of marriage. Choose wisely, establish boundaries and put them to the test of time. On your honeymoon you will be glad that you waited.

    Check out this Free E-Book "The Laws of Dating" by Mike Tucker



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What Guys Said 3

  • Sex complicates things because you don't know whether he naturally felt it wasn't going to work out or if he just "got what he wanted". Yeah, the possibility exists but you'll never know for certain because you gave in so soon. No one but the guy knows if you were just a notch on his headboard or or a potential relationship that he had to think long and hard about before ending.

  • Maybe, but one assumes that if had continued to take you out the would have gotten laid more times. So frankly I don't understand his logic. Why stop at two? He obviously enjoyed it enough the first time to want more. Might actually be the commute.

    • Makes sense. Good luck. I Hope you talk with him and he comes around. Otherwise that's just low (no pun intended! ;))

  • Basically, yeah.


What Girls Said 3

  • 40 minutes isn't really that much of a distance.

    If you really like someone no distance will keep you from seeing them.

    Also, it sounds like he is using that has an excuse because distance wasn't

    a problem for him before he got laid.

    It seems as if he got what he wanted now he is gone.

    This isn't your fault so don't feel bad about it.

    Next time just to be on the safer side of things, try to hold

    out a little longer.

  • yup. 3 and 5 dates is still pretty fast at least for a guy your age.

  • What the hell you dumb ass, why did you sleep with ihm on date 3!? It sounds liek he just wanted sex, got all he wanted from you, so he left. That's why you can't just screw a guy so soon because he may have considered you as girlfriend material but now he thinks you're easy and just hook up material