Is it wrong for me to say the "ball is in her court?"

Ok...long story short: I went on a short dinner date with a girl last week. We had dinner, got ice cream, and had a good time (at least seems like we did). I paid for everything and fulfilled everything my gender role requires me to. After the dinner date, I asked to do it again and she said yes, she just wasn't sure when.

Snce then, she doesn't initiate text message conversations anymore and when I text her it takes hours for her to reply. On top of that, she doesn't tell me when she gets off work so I can walk her to her car (we work together in separate departments). Basically, I kinda feel like she forgot about me. Some people say I should call her but I don't think so because I think its her turn to show interest (if she is)? I just don't understand why she would say yes to a second hangout. What should I do?

Update...this morning she texted me "I hope you have a good weekend." I replied, asked her how she was and when she wanted to hang again. I never got an answer.


Most Helpful Girl

  • She doesn't sound to interested into you anymore. She probably was when you went out. She may have been being nice when you thought you were having a good time. I also think it is possible she isn't to sure with herself, she may have enjoyed everything, but isn't to sure if she could like to do it again. That may be a reason she is ignoring you. Don't push things on her too much, let things heal, because she may just need to think something over you don't know about. Since you went out with her last week, don't push it on her so soon, wait about another week or half and ask again. If she keeps doing this, wait longer and if it continues she isn't interested, only being nice and doesn't want to give a straight up no.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • If someone had interest in you they wouldn't avoid you like she is doing.

    Text her, when does she want to hang out again?

    If she gives the same response "I don't know when"...then forget about her. (she's obviously not interested, she just doesn't want to say so)

    • @update: forget about this girl. she is giving mixed signals, and is not interested.

  • Sounds like she's not really interested, she just doesn't wanna be mean. I would just leave it be and not text her anymore. If she really wanted to go on a second date with you she would gave you a definite yes and let you know when she's available.

    • so are you saying I should just stop talking to her? It doesn't make sense...she was so flirty before and she would initiate conversation and such. And we had a good time at dinner like it really went well. Wouldn't it be awkward to just stop communication?

    • You put on there she doesn't initiate combos anymore. Here's an example. My sister went on a date with a guy, when she came home she expressed to me she has no interest in him. He on the other hand thought it went well and asked for a second date. She told him she is busy with work. She doesn't initiate texts with him but is too nice to tell him straight up she doesn't like him. Maybe ask her one more time about that second date but if she can't tell you if she's available or not I'd leave it be

  • Sounds like she may not be intersted. But there is no harm to try to arrange the 2nd date. If she won't be able to make it, then she will suggest another day and time if she is actually intersted. If not, then you will know..

    • True, but she said she would get back to me. I have shown my interest and have done everything such as asking her out, arranging first date, paying, driving, asking for the second date, etc. I just kinda think its her turn to show interest, wouldn't you think?

    • Show All
    • very true. Thank you

    • I just read your update. If you don't hear back from her by the end of today, then she is unlikely interested :(

What Guys Said 2

  • So you asked her out, and she said she doesn't know when she can do it?

    • Yeah I asked for the second date and she said yes and she'd get back to me.

    • Then I think you shouldn't bother with her.

    • It sounds like she doesn't want to go out with you again. You could ask her out again, but I'd be pissed and just move on.

  • Try to be more of a fun person. Relax more and move on. She does not want a second date with you. Good luck

    • Move on bro, she does not want to hang out and is only being cordial or she like the attention of someone wanting her.