Think I've messed things up with him?

This guy I'm seeing was ignoring me and I was in a "everything sucks, lets see what I can do to ruin my life" mood and stupidly sent him a sh*tty text. Then he updated his fb status to "being single is sh*t" and was having a conversation with someone and he said "yeah its just hard to find a girl that won't treat you like sh*t", as if I don't feel like the worst person already I've now seen this and I feel even worse. I feel like I've shown him a side of me he shouldn't have seen, and I apologized after. Now I'm freaking out that he's going to tell me he doesn't want to see me any more and I don't want that to happen. I care about him so much, we've talked about so much and I've told him loads about me that no one else knows. My problem is I'm so paranoid (where previous guys have treated me like crap) that when something good comes along I have a habit of ruining it. He's dealing with family problems atm too so I feel terrible and I just want to crawl under a rock. I won't see him for a while, so we can't even meet up and talk properly. I know some of his friends and I was thinking of trying to get them to help me out because I feel so bad right now :(


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First off, posting stuff like that on Facebook is immature. The relationship between the two of you guys are your business and your business only and him being on the computer making such statements for 400 other people to read is low and immature.

    Aside from that, what exactly do you mean by "seeing?" Is that dating? In a relationship? Just friends? This makes a huge difference.

    If you guys were in the beginning of a friendship or dating, a harsh text would easily destroy feelings he had for you and it would be difficult to get back. If you guys were actually in a relationship for months, then it should be easier to regain his positive feelings about you.

    Since he is currently dealing with family issues, I wouldn't hound or nag him about "being together." Back off a little, but show that you can still be a friend for him if needed. Ask him if he'd like to talk and show that you have concern in his life. Whenever he starts to come back to you, promise him (only if you're serious) that you'll never hurt him like that again.

    Nothing is guaranteed, but restart as good friends and then see where it goes. Good luck.

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    • Well we've been seeing each other about four months and he said to me that he wants to make me his girlfriend after he's got himself sorted and he can see me more. I'm just freaking out right now, do you think I can save it? I'm really upset, I'm in floods of tears and I don't know what to do

    • I don't know...if he's expressed interest in being in a relationship with you, you should be able to salvage his feelings for you, but not sure. As I said, prove to him you can be selfless and be there for him. Show him you care for him and his feelings should rekindle...just don't pressure him.

    • What should I say to him? Should I call him or text him or wait till I see him in person.

What Guys Said 2

  • well, can't help you here, I'm really lost in your description:

    "and stupidly sent him a sh*tty text. Then he updated his fb status to "being single is sh*t" and was having a conversation with someone and he said "yeah its just hard to find a girl that won't treat you like sh*t","

    Does it make sense?

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  • You can't pass on the pain and fear to someone else. It won't change the fact you were once the victim or will be the victim in the future. Maybe he'll accept the apology and forget it. As long as he's honest and treats you well, don't be afraid.

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