Do I keep trying or do I move on from this?

i broke up with my boyfriend about two months ago, over the phone, for a dumb reason (we were waiting on each other, and I got mad) and I've tried to get back with him, and he's been ignoring me, fine. after the breakup I asked one of the friends if he was okay and if he's talked to him about anything, I'd been trying to apologize to him. he said he hadn't and that they had only talked to him about the camping trip me and my ex were supposed to go on, so I just said 'oh' and about a week later the friend unfriended me. and my boyfriend went on the camping trip without me. I've left everyone else out of the picture, just tried relentlessly to get my ex to talk with me, and I haven't tried any of his other friends or family... and I've seen pictures of my ex with his friends out with each other.

and now, my ex's friend wants to be my friend again? I'm not understanding why he would? my ex boyfriend ignores me at all costs and has made it clear he doesn't want to be around me. the last message I sent to my ex was Sunday that said 'look, I messed up big time. but what we had was something special. I'd like to work things out, could you at least respond?' and he didn't, of course. His friend has a girlfriend so he isn't interested in me. And would this be the gateway to get through to my ex?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Your boyfriend did not like the way you acted and especially how you broke up with him, so he decided to give you a lesson and hurt you. His friend is helping him with that.

    I'm sure he mentioned what happened to his friend and he told him to unfriend you (or it might be his friend's idea) in order to make you wonder and get hurt. He wants you to waste your precious time wondering, crying and whatnot.

    He took those picture for you to feel angry and hurt. He wants you to regret what you did to him and literally beg him to take you back.

    After all this happened, they decided to let his friend add you once more in order to track you. He wants to know how you feel and what you are doing in your life. He wants to see your status update and feel happy if you say "I'm sad/depressed" or something like that.

    I think the two of you are in the wrong, but I think his reactions are very immature. If he really wants to move on with his life, he wouldn't have tried to hurt you like that. He would have simply...just moved on...tried to forget you and that's it.

    All his reactions prove that he did not move on. He just wants to give you a lesson and to see that you're hurt, sad and depressed. He will keep on ignoring your messages until you stop. Once you stop, he will reply with a brief message as a bait for you to start begging all over again. Once he feels that he has an effect on you, he will hurt you again. It's a mind game.

    Do you want him to stop? Do you want him to wake up from this immature episode that hit him in the head? Then, accept his friend's request but never say anything on your profile. Let him suffer to know anything about you. Being mysterious will make him feel so angry. Just stop sending any messages, be calm and just wait. He'll contact you for sure.

    When he contacts you, don't beg him to come back. Just act normal and all.

    Meanwhile, you need to think if he's really the right guy for you.

    Hope this helps. :)

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What Guys Said 1

  • Look, your boyfriend is hurt and angry because you broke up with him, and he isn't interested in letting you get close to him again so that you can hurt him again.

    Obviously you didn't take the act of breaking up with him seriously enough, because to him (and to many other people), it's a BIG deal, and even something of a betrayal. In the future, you need to think long and hard before you break up with someone, because you often won't get a second chance, and it doesn't sound like you're likely to get one in this case either.

    I'd go ahead and move on.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Just allow the friend to be your Facebk friend, but don't send any messages. It looks like you hurt your ex and he is trying to move on. Maybe he decided he didn't want to spend time with you because you got so mad about something that wasn't such a big deal.

    Now though, you have done everything you can to apologize. You should let him have his space. Try to occupy your time with other things, so you aren't thinking about him as much.

    Eventually he will either contant you and/or you will move on and find someone else (and you will).

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