Do guys have to try really hard to get a girl's heart?

I notice that sometimes girls expect too much of men, guys must do this and not do that, if a guy likes you he would move mountains for you and other stuff as well. I mean I am all about making the 1st move, invite them out, message them first, maybe take a little crap as well.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well some guys have to try really hard, I hate to say it but girls makes it easier for some guys, and for others harder it depends on the guy, and girl. (I know you've heard that many times, I'm sorry >.>)

    I'll give you one example. What had to do to get my girlfriend is invite her to my home I think it was easy because we both figured out we were next door neighbors so there was no way she could refuse. I had to sit her down and look into her eyes and guess what she was feeling.

    I got it right and 9 months later which is roughly now, I still have her and we love each other very much. :)

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What Girls Said 10

  • Not Even A Little.

    I believe like anyone that getting someone to open up or even receiving that persons love is hard to do when they have walls that surround them. Although some people love more willing/easily than others. I suppose it really depends on the object of your desire.

    When I say, not even a little, I mean I do not think that it's hard to gain love if you yourself are pure in your intentions and are willing to be dedicated to that person.

    Some people may require you to do things or maybe even destroy the wall that they have built around them as well as be patient with them for they may have been hurt before. Some things are easier than others. People often say they will do anything for the ones that they love but that does not always hold true in the end.

    If you believe that it is hard to win a girls heart after everything I suppose after you have captured her mind, body, and soul...I guess all you can ask is, was it worth it?

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  • I don't expect the world from any guy; in fact, I really hate getting gifts. XD All I expect is to be shown that I'm important to him. Whether it's bringing me over to meet his family, or telling off a jerk who's being rude to me. As long as I get the message. :)

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  • Being genuine is the best thing...it makes it so easy but if we feel like a guy is not being sincere in his actions/motives then of course we reel back and put up a wall that a guy would have to break if he was in the the long haul.

    I think anyone should put in more than the minimum amount of effort when trying to capture someone's heart, if they treat it like a menial task then you probably shouldn't put up with them :)

    And girls are also 'trained' in a way to think that guys that don't go big don't like them which of course isn't true :)

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  • I do not expect tons and tons from a guy. I just want what I am giving. And that's basically just the normal things, nothing over the top. I think it depends on the girl... but the ones wanting so much aren't worth it... guys or girls...

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  • With me,yes. My current guy has never tried...

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  • No you don't have to, a guy can get my heart easy is he's a gentleman and just generally really sweet, nice, and kind, but she'll feel a lot more special if you do. :)

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  • i think when you're truly compatible and just click with each other, it should be a smooth ride and not much effort is required. for people that feel like they have to try so much, its probably just not a good relationship match.

    there are no rules in love, when you fall in love with a girl, you just fall. and there's no time to think about all that you mentioned, doing this doing that la la la...

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  • Well I don't fall in love with every guy who wants to get with me, so I guess yeah you would have to try really hard.

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    • you sound like too much work. What if you miss somebody because your walls were so high up?

    • Show All
    • Who is determining who the best and the good guys are?

      And how do you know what my standards are and what I use to disqualify potential suitors are?

      My judgment and man picking skills are just fine

    • well just for personal knowledge, what would a guy have to do to make you fall for him?

  • Nope just whisper sweet nothings in her ear and that will do the trick

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  • I don't think my boyfriend had to "try really hard" more like he had to prove to me that when I give him my heart he's going to take care of it. He didn't have to jump through hoops or anything just show me it's actually love.(:

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What Guys Said 5

  • It really depends.

    You can move those mountains for some girls, and they still walk all over you.

    Other girls swoon over you if you spend a day with her and the kid, instead of your current girlfriend or your other baby's momma.

    In some cases it can be the same girl in the above situation relating to different guys (though the difference in the specific examples given is admittedly extreme).

    The very important thing to understand is the "currency" of what we're worth as mates, is highly subjective. In fact it is almost completely subjective - where you can be a chunk of gold but if you don't value yourself and your friends and colleagues don't value yourself, then to any girl your value, and value of any good deeds you do, is nil.

    If you want the mountains you move to be worth something to someone, you need to make sure you hold yourself in a high regard and those close to you do too. Otherwise a kidney you donate could be valued no more than a piece of gum Justin Bieber might have chewed for a second before he spit it out because he did not like the flavour.

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  • I feel like it's next to impossible.

    Honestly, I'm not big on head games. And I won't move mountains for a woman unless she deserves it. If she can give, I will give, too.

    I don't like "hard to get." Some girls may think they're playing hard to get, and they "play" themselves right out of a potential relationship; I don't really have an idea of "playing hard to get" verses showing no sign of interest, because to me, there is no difference. It looks the same.

    If a woman can't give a little on the dating "dance" I become disinterested pretty quickly.

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  • The worst part of it is I don't have to do anything. Frankly, I never try. Some girls really like me, although I don't understand why. I am not exactly handsome, although I may be considered a well-educated person. It's a bit unfair: I think I must do something to attract attention.

    My guess will be: some girls really don't expect you to move mountains (or other large objects). I probably would do a lot, but the trouble is: I don't know what to do. It would be easier if my partner asks me to do something, not just expect me to guess.

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  • no I believe that guys have to be themselves and understand that not all girls will like the same thing.

    Thus, regardless of whatever happens be yourself and be honest with your feelings and be willing to accept rejection

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  • i hate how we guys have to be comfortable and content being single but girls don't have to

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