So I really like this guy. We actually met online. We have mutual friends though. We've been talking for about 8 months. Every time we try to hang out and finally meet he flakes out on me. I finally asked him why and he says Because I put too much pressure on Him expecting a nice date and everything. He just wants to take me out for ice cream and walk around talking. I said no and if he cared like he says he does he would take me somewhere nice and not just treat it like a casual date. He thinks I'm being ridiculous. But I asked him too Because I have been through a lot and my last boyfriend was very emotionally, verbally, and physically abusive. I understand that's not his fault, but I told him because of this he needed to do a little more and try harder. He just got mad at me and kept saying how its all about money with me. Its really not. It just shows me he cares more if he takes me out somewhere nice. Am I in the wrong? He thinks I am and wants to cancel the date. I think he's being a jerk honestly.
Most Helpful Girl
Well I think you are both wrong in this scenario.
1) You have every right to expect that a guy take you on a serious date, especially after what you've been through. It's not even about an expensive place (to me anyway), it just seems like a lot of guys these days try to get out of going on real dates for whatever reason. To keep it more casual, maybe they just want sex, etc. Going on a real date says he's serious. So he was wrong to make you feel bad about your preference.
2) You were wrong for telling him this and for waiting around for 8 months. You want a guy that wants to do this for you. Telling him his date idea wasn't good enough is actually rude, but mostly unnecessary. If he wasn't happy to do this earlier on and without you having to tell him, then you shouldn't have wasted your time. You were wrong to make him feel bad about his preference. You should walk away at this point.3