How much chasing do you think is enough?

I can't say I'm the most experienced guy in the world when it comes to relationships, but I've had a few experiences with girls. Some of them, of course, where cases of friend zoning. I'm a romantic guy and at first, I though that the road to a girl's heart came through what seems natural: showing interest, complimenting her, and caring. Obviously that was a highway to the zone! So I started changing my tactics, and I'm proud to say that I haven't let my dignity slide since the last time I was friend zoned 3 years ago.

The thing is, I don't think I'm making any great progress with that. And I started realizing that I'm on the completely opposite end only recently when I met a girl through a friend. This guy friend of mine has something going with a girl, and she invited him along with one of his friends -who happened to be me- at her place, where there was a female friend of hers too. I really liked my 'blind date', but her personality made me question my tactics. She is really hard to flirt with, and I couldn't get much going aside a joke about how she looks like a girl starring in a show in my country and how we are both well-paid actors in soap operas. But I still like her and I don't want to give up so easily. So far, if the girl didn't respond at my first attempts at flirting, I gave it up, because I thought chasing a girl could make her think I'm her puppy dog and make me lose my dignity. On the other hand, I've heard stories of confident guys who weren't afraid to chase after a hard girl and finally got her. So I'm thinking that maybe I'm too tight and too proud, and that I should loosen up, but I don't know how to chase a girl the right way? So what do you think I should do specifically with this girl but also in general?

Specifically for her, I don't think we will go out again because my friend and his love interest - her friend - had some kind of a dispute, so my only hope so far is Facebook!


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Most Helpful Guy

  • A guy has to show enough interest without becoming desperate. Girls loved to be chased and they are always looking back to see if the guy is still there. If a guy runs ahead of them they will get tired of him and find another guy to play with. The secret is that the guy needs to disappear while the girl is looking forward.

    POOF the guy is gone!

    That way when they turn around to smile and laugh at the guy for chasing them he isn't there!

    "OH MY GOD WHERE DID HE GO!? IS HE CHASING SOMEONE ELSE!?"

    thats when the girl stops running and starts standing on her tippy toes looking for the guy. After enough time they will eventually send out a cry, "SQUAWK!" and hope he answers. Eventually, the girl will begin to graze in the meadow... that's when the guy sneaks back up behind her and BAM! the fun chase begins again.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think chasing is always okay, until stalking or peep tomming is involved. Or if the guy is planning to "take it".

    But, I like the chase. It's interesting.

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  • If you started flirting, and she doesn't respond back then slow your pace! She may be shy or may not like it. Act normal because she might not feel comfortable. If she is a shy girl, then it's probably because she didn't know how to re-act to your flirting since she never really has flirted with anyone before.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Myeah. Some girls that don't show interest will cave in if you just keep the flirting at max. A friend just landed a hottie the first day of meeting her by just saying sexual things and trying to touch her every chance he got. After two hours of talking he gave her a piggy back ride, he put his arm around her back and would always try to hold her hand. She backed away a few times and tried to get away but eventually she just caved in and went with it. I would certainly think he was borderline creepy and my dignity would get in the way of looking that desperate but apparently that works sometimes. I don't know I think being super aggressive can work especially if you are working on limited time like you were. Or maybe these girls really like attention and just showering them with it is enough to get in their pants. There are no absolutes in the pick up game which is why it sucks sometimes.

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