Did I screw up everything with this girl?

There is this girl that I have a special chemistry with. We talk a lot, we goof around and it is very satisfying to be around her. And lately I've been thinking about her more and more. I think I love her. But, one of these nights, I went out with my friends and got a bit drunk and I ended up hooking up with some random girl. Pretty stupid I know. Worst of all, some of my friends informed this girl about my behavior, and now she is truly upset with me. She is been avoiding me, she doesn't talk to me as often and when she does she does it in such a cold manner... She told me once that she really hates womanizer jerks, and now she probably thinks I am just another one. I feel really bad. What should I do?

Updates:
It is a good advice alices, but thing is, none of us ever "formaly" express the wish to be more than Friends, so a message of apologizing will sound a bit awkward... I tried asking her what's going on but she never answers proprerly. I guess I really need to tell her how I feel.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Were you two officially in a relationship?

    If yes, I would agree with her.

    If no, despite that it still probably should have been avoided, you're going to have to start from scratch. She may not be able to trust if you go out with friends and have that loom over her feelings because if you end up in a serious relationship trust is one of (if not the) biggest things.

    Just talk to her. Tell her it was stupid and that you're glad she found out because you want to be honest with her. Tell her how you feel and ask her how to make it up to her. You may have to make a few sacrifices.

    Communication is the only thing that will make it better and texting doesn't count. You need to talk face to face.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Personally, if you didn't make a commitment, I don't think you've done anything wrong. And since it was just a hook-up, it plainly isn't a question of you liking the random girl more.

    A womanizer manipulates women, and a jerk is disrespectful to them. Were you either of these things to the random girl?

    Imo, the girl you're worried about is a drama mama.

    If you HAVE made a commitment, or made it seem to her like you've made a commitment, you're a jackass.

    Otherwise, she'll probably get over it and is using this as a way to get you to pay more attention to her - which you really should have done in the first place. So, tell her how you feel, tell her you're sorry you hurt her (don't say you're sorry you slept with the girl if you're only sorry she found out about it), and give her the attention she plainly wants. Keep in mind - she may not be doing this consciously, and I am not judging her for it. People deserve attention from their girl/boyfriend.

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  • So let me tell you that you didn't do anything wrong (cause you two weren't going out), but I gotta tell you this too. It's really understandable that she's upset. She probably feels that you were screwing around with her, and that you have plenty other girls who you have that "special chemistry" with. If I were you, I would send her a long message through Facebook or text , whatever. It would be better to tell her in person but she may be upset to have that conversation with you. On the other hand, if you send her a message, she'll have time to read it over and over again, and calm down. Apologize. Even if you technically didn't do anything wrong (as in you didn't cheat), and tell her how you feel (how she's the one you think about everyday). Trust me, any girl can't stay mad at you if you do this :) than good luck!

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    • : It is a good advice alices, but thing is, none of us ever "formaly" express the wish to be more than Friends, so a message of apologizing will sound a bit awkward... I tried asking her what's going on but she never answers proprerly. I guess I really need to tell her how I feel

    • read your update :). and I know what you mean. your just not sure if she feels the "special chemistry" you feel around her right? than yea, I guess a long ass message may make things awkward. you should talk to her than. ask her what's up and it she's upset or something. you can also message her to "hang out" or something like "hey can you talk ___time ___day?". and yes, either way its better for you to tell her how you feel.

    • so we commented almost simultaneously. hope you got the comment! :)

What Guys Said 1

  • Seeems like you f***ed up, you need new friends that aren't f***ing cockblockers. Gotta handle your liqour mate.

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