I think I might have made a terrible mistake. Help?

Hello, my problem in a nutshell is that I sent an email to someone that I liked, but in hindsight I am regretting it because of possible stereotypes and the misreading of actions.

Here's the story: I'm a Black American and the "someone" is a Korean. I had a feeling that this particular Korean had a crush on me because I could see him constantly checking me out, sitting and being next to me extremely often, being nervous around me, etc etera, et cetera (Would this be considered flirting, maybe? I have no idea. No matter what it was, I think I misread what it meant). I liked him too and basically did the stuff that he did to me in return, I cannot lie, but, being the introvert that I am, had no idea how to go about telling him that I liked him because I'm not extremely social. So instead, I waited.

By the end of the school year (I still go to school, high school to be exact), I still notice that he does look and stay near me (teachers started teasing us at this point too. Ah, good times), so I think, 'Hey, he still probably likes me. Woo-hoo!' So I send him an email confessing my 'love' for him. It was rather long-winded. Haha. But anyway, and of course, I haven't heard a response yet (can't say I expected to). Now I'm becoming a tad concerned. Do you think that I shouldn't have sent the email at all? I know I should have confronted him about it, but I am entirely too shy of a person. And I tend to over-explain things, which I think I'm doing right now.

And when I say 'stereotypes,' I mean the Korean v. Dark People stereotype. I was quite desperate to know what this was all about when I heard about it so I looked it up. It seems to be that about 75% of all Koreans are racist towards people that have dark skin (even if it's a dark skinned Korean). I understand that this could be totally false and I don't really believe it myself, but it also could not (I'm not saying all Koreans aren't racist, but when I read this it concerned me a bit). I don't know if he and his family are racist or not, but I'm hoping that they aren't. Racism, as well as stereotyping, is very bad, as I'm sure (most of) you know.

Sorry to waste so much of your time (if you read thus far, I really appreciate it) and I hope you can help me in some way. What I'm basically asking is:

What should I have done in this situation? Did I do the right thing or should I have done nothing? What do you think I should've done, if what I have done was a stupid thing to do?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You like him and you got the point across to him. Doesn't matter whether he likes you back or if he is racist or not. If you didn't do that, there was a chance that nothing would have happened. I admire your courage.

    How long ago did you send it? He either didn't see it or doesn't know how to respond (which sounds very likely). Hey, you took a shot. It's all good.

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    • I sent it on...June 8th, about a month ago. And thanks. I appreciate the response.

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    • Thanks for best answer.

    • No problem. I like what you said and how you said it. It makes me feel like I didn't make a mistake, but rather opened Schr?dinger's box to find out if the cat was dead or alive. I guess I'll find out how the cat is doing when I see him next month. Thank you for the advice.

What Guys Said 1

  • That is brave of you and good job. Sorry there has been no response. I think you did the right thing. I think he maybe did not know how to respond but that is just a guess.

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What Girls Said 3

  • Yeah, you came off entirely too thirsty and probably creeped him out. You should have just kept flirting with him and started a conversation with him and got to know him better

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    • Yeah, like I said, I'm kicking myself now that I actually think about what I've done. Ah well, people come and go. I'll find somebody else, if I did creep him out. Haha.

  • This is put together so well, I'm amazed. You seem wise for your age. I think the guy who got BA said it all so I won't say anymore. XD

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  • I don't know really. He may feel the same but didn't know how to react/say or he may not and is just trying to take his time to know what to do about the situation. maybe he didn't get his email? all you can do is try to see him or wait til you go back to school and see what he has to say.

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