My friend stopped talking to me when I admitted my feelings for her. Now that I am fit she came back.

I spent a year chasing her and she acted as if she was my girlfriend. I did everything but she didn't love me back. A month ago I told her my feelings but she said she only liked me as a friend and we stopped talking to each other. But yesterday somebody posted a picture of me at the beach and an hour later she sent me a message asking me how were my vacations going. I didn't answer, what should I do?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well speaking as a girl this has happened to it may not be that your fitness is the reason. It might of been about timing. Unless you know everything about her she might of been talking to someone else or liked someone else. Then it ended and when she saw your photo it jogged her memory. That's what happened to me, I didn't even see my friend as being interested in that way because I was crushing on someone else. Then when he told me it threw me for a loop so we drifted apart. Things ended with the other guy then as I was going through my phone I found his texts and realized he really did care and got back in touch.

    And even yes we all hope to believe that people want us exactly how we are but maybe this girl wants a healthier guy, or a happier guy or whatever, people change for one another all the time, you shouldn't count her out completely. If you're worried about her just being fickle then talk to het and find out if she is or not. You obviously still have feelings or you wouldn't of asked this question

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What Girls Said 2

  • She just asked you how your vacation went- that is hardly shallow of her to do. Its only been a month, chances are you haven't changed so drastically that she decided to go after you based on superficial reasons. Had it been a year and you dropped a significant amount of weight and underwent huuuuuuge changes, THEN I could understand your point there.

    It has been a month, and that is enough time apart for her to feel comfortable talking to you again after you admitted your feelings for her, so I would look at it that way. She needed time apart, and now that she has had that, she is looking to rekindle a friendship.

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    • I did change drastically. I was so sad when she stopped talking to me that I started working out everyday making hundreds of abs and push ups. (so that I would keep her out of my mind). She s been talking to other guys and seemed to have completely forgotten me. I would have agreed with the fact that its a question of timing if she would ve waited at least a year to be sure that I moved on.

    • Im not saying you didn't change at all physically, what I am saying is that if looks were what was stopping her, a month of physical change wouldn't be what changes her mind. A month isn't enough to completely change your physical appearance, so I doubt the new looks is what is bringing her back around.

  • I honestly would answer her like you would answer any other friend. She at least was honest enough to tell you straight up that she didn't feel the same way, so I giver her some credit because that can be hard to do. At this point, if she changed her mind about the "more then friends" aspect, let her make the move because youve already put your feelings out there once.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Talk with her. Do not get your emotions mixed during the conversation. Say "My vacation was what I needed. A lot in my mind but it feels much better to be back. How is your summer going?" Keep it simple but genuine like that. Good Luck

    -Nick Halden

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