I feel so stuck.... any advice?

I don't so much have a question I think I more just want to get this out, and if you have any comments or advice that would be more than appreciated. I'm 24 my boyfriends 27 and we have been together for almost 4 years. The last couple of months have been quite rough. he's a christian so we don't really have sex depending on your definition I guess. We do all the stuff you would consider foreplay though. This is something that I've never really understood and always had a hard time with. But recently he doesn't even want to do anything physical which really gets me down, I think as women we need to feel wanted and desired and like our man can't keep his hands off us lol. ATM he will kiss me like he wants to but when we get into bed he won't make any moves, he's happy to watch TV or go to sleep. And I just get so frustrated and confused by him. The other thing is that I have made a new friend, a guy who I chat to a lot on FB. He has made it clear to me that he is interested in me and I have made it clear to him that I don't want anything more than a friendship. So I probably shouldn't be hanging out with this guy but he makes me feel so good about myself. He actually visited me last night and ended up staying over but we only cuddled although I knew he wanted more which made me feel good.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You need to realize that not having sex with your boyfriend is not normal and it will, or has destroyed your relationship. You are already cheating on him and it will only get worse. You need to end your relationship with your Boyfriend before it gets worse, you will hate yourself for a very long time if you don't and in the end you will hurt him all that much more. Sex is not the whole relationship but it does play a very important part on how intimate you are with your partner, not to mention a actual physical need.

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What Guys Said 3

  • lol? only cuddled? it's like cheating. so, you actually cheated on your boyfriend - especially in this case where you two never got much further than cuddling. unbelievable.

    please, cut this looser loose. after 4 years of no sex you must be crazy for some cock, which is understandable. stop this madness. he will never satisfy you even when you two start having sex - and I don't know when this will actually happen.

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    • Yes only cuddled! lol. Honestly, I think we both were just enjoying each others company.

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    • Yeah I know all that and Yes I know I'm am in the wrong here, really really in the wrong, I know that he would be so hurt if he found out and that would just kill me.

    • Cuddling is not like cheating. It is cheating.

  • You have a boyfriend yet you cuddled with another guy? Classy.

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  • My advice to you is to be honest with yourself, if you're miserable with one guy because of his flaws, and another makes you happy, go with that one.

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    • I wish I could take pieces from both of them lol. My boyfriend and I have a really good relationship apart from this one thing. And my friend, well he's a good friend, but that's it.

What Girls Said 1

  • Give your boyfriend the bottom line. He may be christian but it's not a one person relationship, it's made of two people that have different needs, beliefs and thoughts. You obviously have needs and he's not fulfilling them so you have to talk to him about it (but don't tell him you cuddled with another guy). If he's christian it probably means he's waiting for marriage to have sex and that's probably an issue that was pushed early on by his parents or fellow christians because they are old fashioned beliefs. But that doesn't change the fact that he is in a serious relationship in which he needs to take action or it'll eventually fall apart. As some other people said sex is a very important part of a serious relationship, I'd say like a 25%. Intimacy shows a great deal of things to your partner. Talk to him about it and let him know this is important, I'm sure he'll understand.

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