Would you date someone with no friends

My friend is on a dating site and she has been talking to a guy, however she says he told her he doesn't have any friends. He only talk to guys at work but they don't meet outside of work. Plus he lived in a different state for years and decided to move back to his home town and he has no friends that he calls or who calls him. I am wary of this and things she should step back from talking to him. It seems odd to me that someone doesn't even has one friend (not even one). What do you think


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly, most likely I wouldn't. That to me would indicate some things about his personality.

    Most likely...

    - he's not social. That's not good for me because I'm very social and enjoy really social events and outings when dating

    - there are things about him that people don't like.

    Now, on some occasions there are some really awesome people who feel like they have no friends, but there are people who want to be their friends. There are people out there who enjoy their company. Yet they are simply more introverted and they just don't have a strong desire to go out there and make a lot of friends and take basic connectons further.

    So it all depends, but generally if him having no friends was because people don't want to be friends with him; I'd view it as a red flag and be turned off.

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    • *things about him people don't like that may dominate his personality and general interactions with people

What Guys Said 9

  • With your friend's situation, its paramount that she asks the right questions.

    Not having any friends by default doesn't automatically mean "terrible person to date".

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    He could have moved around a lot so he wasn't able to make close.bonds beyond acquaintances.

    Maybe he was/is VERY focused on his schooling / career to the point of harvesting close friendships wasn't s priority. This could definitely be a factor if he grew up poor. As a Jamaican I know you can appreciate someone on the grind. :-D

    He could have a disorder like anxiety disorder or ADD/ADHD, that makes him mentally flustered in social situations.

    Maybe he's been betrayed so much by former friends that he doesn't keep close friends anymore and keeps them casual acquaintance at best.

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    What your friend should do is ask more things about him (upbringing, where he grew up, fun things he's done, etc.)...to understand WHY, with more background info, he doesn't have any close friends.

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    Don't judge until you know the whole story. :)

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    • True but let me ask you this because I am Jamaican I know what its like for someone to be on their grind? Just because jamaicans grow up with that gene or something? LOL you crazy Anthony

  • well what about me. I lost all of my childhood friends over the past say 10 years. first off I am very shy when it comes to meeting new people, or making new friends. It's not that I can't do it, but it is very difficult for me to find people that have the same interests as me in my area. so over the past 10 years, sice high school, the group of friends I was hanging around with started getting into drugs, like smoking weed and doing shrooms and whatt not. I honestly don't know how far they went with it, But to me it seemed like they wanted weed all the time, everyday, if they ran out they went to get more. I didn't want to be involved with that, and some of them knew this, but when one of them called me to hang out I would ask them are you guys smoking tonight, if they said yes I would not go. so slowely they started to separate from me. But I was not good at making new friends, I kind of made some friends but after high school I never saw them again.

    During college, I made some friends, but most of them were from far away and I really couldn't see them outside of school.

    so I wouldn't say that someone having no friends is a bad thing, especially if they are moving around

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  • I wouldn't mind dating someone without friends, even though I'm very social myself. I think there are some wonderful people out there who are just shy, or a bit socially awkward, or have moved around too much to make lasting friendships, who are indeed worth getting to know.

    Of course, she should always be cautious when meeting people on dating sites, that's just common sense.

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  • Hmm you can be a bit of loner but the question is whether your communication skills is any good.

    Some people talk a lot and have a lot of friends but are idiots.

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  • Well, at the very least, she couldn't complain about not getting along with his friends :)

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  • Hermit. He is probably very introverted. It is only weird to the extrovert. I'm not quite that introverted. I talk to a few people. but everyone else doesn't really matter that much to me.

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  • Yeah. I'm not going to compound any problems they may have (if they have any at all) from not having friends and not date them either.

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  • I have pretty much no friends (only like 5 good friends tops) and I have a girlfriend, I just get very nervous when meeting new people and get a mental block.

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  • no friends at all? that's weird. but many times friend distance themselves and then you're left pretty much by yourself, especially if you're not that social, so yeah I'd still date them

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    • but don't you think if people are distancing themselves, then maybe they saw a quality in you that was not so good? and want nothing to do with you?

    • What I mean by distancing themselves is that they don't make an effort to remain friends! I obviously say this out of my own experiences, but it's very true that sometimes you have few friends because they're not into the friendship.

What Girls Said 1

  • Yes, of course I would. He probably is just introvert... I know lots of people who are amazing but lonely, that's not a big deal.

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