Going on a date in a couple hours? Fear that I will be stood up!

I have a date in not too long and my nervousness has been taken over by the fear that I will be stood up. The last guy I met through a dating site did and it was awful. Now this one I am almost positive wouldn't, but I can't help but worry. He has assured me of it for a week now everyday that it will happen because he really wants to meet. I however am a nervous wreck especially while I wait for a confirmation text. And I know logically he is busy but this is how it went the other time. The guy just wouldn't answer my calls or texts and I thought maybe something happened to his phone and I drove an hour to meet him halfway to be stood up. Any advice to calm my frazzled nerves?

Updates:
I don't know I might just call this off I sent him a text that said if I didn't hear from him by a certain time I would assume it was off and he immediatley replied OK. And never answered my OK yes or no because I need to know as I am fitting this in between a lot of things and he knows that.
Well everyone thanks for the help but it seems as though the whole thing is off. He chose a day he knew I ws quite busy and I tried to accomodate him. Somehow he thought I was pushy and became a very hateful person. Just done I think.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Take a deep breath Hold for 5 seconds. Now breath out completely like you are blowing out a candle. Put your favorite (relaxing or happy) music on. (A suggestion: Beautiful World by Adam Crossley). Sit down and enjoy the music. Instead of focussing on the bad thing that could happen. Imagine how the perfect date would go. Don't think about him not responding at the moment. Just sit there, enjoying the music and thinking about positive things.

    That guy who stood you up was a jerk for not showing up. He could have AT LEAST texted you that he couldn't make it. You have to understand that if a guy doesn't show, that it IS NOT your fault! He is the one who did not show. You did everything right. I am not saying that this guy you are about to date isn't going to show (I really think that he will), but you have to understand that these things aren't your fault.

    I hope this helped :)

    If you have any questions, ask them!

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    • Well thank you. Yes I have no idea what was wrong with the other guy. He had called me every night for a week ever since we had talked on the phone. And like I said the day of the date he wouldn't answer and I found it odd so went anyway thinking perhaps something happened to his phone. He never responded to my message or email. And I know I am better off but having the hostess pity me while I was upset was not a good feeling.

What Guys Said 3

  • The point of the date is not to impress him.

    Its to see if you two connect well.

    If you don't, then you learned something.

    Relax.

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  • Remember this is a FIRST date...if he doesn't show up, then go to the bar and pick up another cute guy to accompany you! ;-)

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  • Drink a beer and masturbate.

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    • Forget him then. He is truly an ahole

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    • Yeah I just sent him a goodbye text. It actually upsets me a lot because I kinda liked him but he freaked out and told me he wouldn't put up with my bs. I told him that while today I could do a date it was not the best day as I am trying to move but its the only night I have off for quite a while. I tried to schedule it earlier in the week when I did have time and it was not good for him. So he already knew I was under pressure today trying to get everything ready to move tomorrow.

    • I also don't understand why he would tell me he wants this to work and can't wait to meet me or till we are together and he likes me etc just to be an ass hours before we meet?

What Girls Said 2

  • Breathe.

    Inhale and exhale.

    Everything will be fine.

    Just know that these are two different men, so continue to give him an open opportunity to prove he isn't like this to you.

    If he does do the same thing, do not let this stop you from dating.

    Sometimes you have to run into a few slim balls along the way before you find someone that is worth giving your time to.

    If he does not answer your calls at least now you know not to drive to meet him, and to move on from that point.

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    • Well I'm not sure of his school schedule so he might not be able to honestly or his work schedule. He did tell me he wasn't free until the time we decided to meet. I suppose I will go and hope for the best regardless.

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    • Well thank you I'm just upset I spent so much time on this guy. But to be honest at this point they are. Every single one screws me over at some point.

    • I know how you feel. What helps me along the way is this way of thinking.

      "I really like this guy. But realize that there is always room for disappointment." So whenever you get very excited about someone, keep that in mind. There are very flip floppy men. Sorry you had to meet them in a row. But keep trying, you will find one worth your time. Don't let your bad experiences turn you sour (because in a sense, you are letting these flip floppy men get the best of you).

  • Worst case scenario is that he does stand you up. But you know what? That says nothing about you, it only speaks poorly about him. He's the a**hole for you not following through.

    Make sure not to call/text too often, as to not scare him off. If he's a good guy, he'll be there. And if he does stand you up, you don't want to be with a jerk like that anyway.

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    • Well I know that. I just don't feel like looking like an idiot again. And if he hasn't been scared off by my bout of paranoia earlier in the week he isn't gonna be scared off easily. Having to defend him though does really help it a little. I have posted about how all I have dated are a**holes and he seems nice and that frightens me as well. But on to the new and better right.

    • Right : ) New and better and nice!

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