Invited as a date to her friend's wedding.

Someone I know has invited me to be her date at her friends wedding. The thing is, I don't know if it's a legit date, or if I'm just 'the friend'. I've asked her out in the past, and she turned me down. That was a few years ago. Since then she has had a lot happen in her life. Stuff I won't get into her because I believe it to be too personal. I've had feelings for her since I really got to know her about 5 years ago.

Another problem I have is that either way, date or friend. I intend to go with her. I ZERO idea of what to wear. I realize she will tell me what the invite says. But I don't own any type of suit or nothing and I don't even have dress shoes. I suppose once I know what attire is expected I can go buy it though.

Another thing to consider though is that I am severely overweight. Like huge. I've accepted it and I am trying to do something about it, But I highly doubt I will have noticeable change before the wedding. How would I dress in this situation? Would a tailor be able to customise something for me and make it look good?

Next problem is.. I don't dance. Will it be expected? Should I do something to learn? I could ask my sister for some sort of lessons.

I really appreciate all of you guys here, most of you are helpful in your responses and I've learned to just shut out the ones that aren't


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What Girls Said 1

  • Well I would just go into this with the assumption that you two will be going as friends. It will make for a lot less potential of things becoming awkward and a lot more gratifying if the assumption is wrong. As for the suit, I would visit a big and tall store and see if they do suit rentals or if they sell suits. If they don't rent any suits, your best bet would be to buy one. Whether it be from the big and tall store or from a custom tailor. Buying a suit is always a good investment to make because unlike us women, men can reuse the same suit for years for special events like a wedding, an interview, a funeral, a chistening/baptism, court, etc etc. As for the dancing, have your sister show you a couple basic moves for some up-tempo songs and then have her show you how to do a simple slow dance.

    I hope this helps! :)

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    • Immensely. Thank you.

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    • The most confusing part was she specifically said "date" though. Personally, I would have asked a friend along the lines of, "Hey, you think you would want to go to this wedding with me?"

      She phrased it like "You want to go with me as my date to _____'s wedding?"

      I still do like your advice of going as a friend and seeing where it goes from there.

    • I know for a guy that can seem like a pretty weird way of wording things. But it is common terminology for a person's guest to a wedding to be referred to as their "date" or their "plus one", as it is usually written out on the wedding invitations. But weddings amd wedding terminology is all in girl world so it can be easily misconstrued by the opposite gender. And yeah, going into as simply friends is your best bet. But the most important thing is to have a good time! Wedding receptions are fun!:)

What Guys Said 1

  • Rent a tux/suit man. They tailor will size you correctly so that you will look great in it. But honestly though at your age you really should own at least one suit for job interviews and such. Put that on the back burner. As for dancing, there isn't any expectation that you know how to dance but if you are concerned you could call up the girl that invited you and ask if she'd like to practice together so you don't end up stepping on her feet. That also gives you a good way to gauge her interest level in you since dancing is a pretty erotic activity when done correctly.

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