Have you ever dated someone with a mood disorder?

Just want to know what that would be like, sounds like an emotional roller-coaster that I would rather not ride.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • He was moody before..it's gotten better and had pretty much dissolved by the time we started dating.

    It was tiring and I didn't know what to do..but found out later it was a lot of family stuff going on and depression so it equaled out to a very extreme partner. Thank goodness that's all over.

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    • awesome that you two stuck it through. I see you are a fan of freddie, amazing singer god rest his soul

    • Yeah, through it all I got faith in the fact that people can change another ..way more than previously expected ha...

      Freddie Fan ^_^ for life :) !

      ...one of the best things about this site is that unexpected sweet moment when you find someone who knows who Freddie Mercury is

    • Thanks :)

What Girls Said 19

  • I am bipolar and I keep pushing men away with my behavior ...when I'm feeling myself it goes amazing but then I go hot and cold a lot and always mess it up :(...feel like I will never find a guy who is willing to put up with my down days, you guys should realize its an illness and we can't help it!

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    • hey girl thanks for sharing. sounds like quite a struggle for you. I hope people out there get the message that there is a lot more to you than this disorder and that, if they are willing to give it a shot, you are worth getting to know. I advise you to engage in regular exercise, it has strong antidepressive effects and will level you out a lot more. I've dealt with depression personally and this fixed it, no medication or anything.

  • I imagine its kind of a rollercoaster for my boyfriend, as I have depression. But as long as they're aware of their issues and trying to work on them, you come to realize that a person is not defined by their mood disorder. They are so much more than that, and if you happen to fall in love with them, you accept every part of them.

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    • thanks for sharing your experience. it's good to you are open about it with him. just know that dexpression is a VERY common one. try regular exercise, it will help you to get a grip on your sadness...it's as effective as prescription medication.

  • I'm sure I've dated guys with undiagnosed mood disorders. Like one guy in particular I believe was bipolar.his emotions were really up and down.charming at first but if he felt slighted, he'd be really spiteful. He was obsessed with me years after we broke up.

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    • thanks for sharing your experience. hope he's still not obsessed with you, better lock your doors at night ;-)

  • Lol did you just ask this to dis the mental illness community? Because if so they are pissed, sad, confused, happy and inspired :p

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  • As being someone who has a mood disorder, I would never date someone else with it. You get affected by so much external stuff and internal stuff that has literally nothing to do with the people around you, but they will think it's their fault anyway.

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    • thanks for you answer crimsonroses. I guess it makes sense that you wouldn't date someone with the same problem you are struggling with yourself. As the saying goes, You wouldn't eat in the same bowl you $h!t in.

  • My friend had bipolar and some tendencies of borderline personality disorder. Its been pretty much a roller coaster for her especially in terms of dating. At the moment she has decided to take a break from it all together , which is helping her I think.

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  • Kind of. I dated a guy with autism once, and while he was really smart he just didn't understand emotions and that made it really difficult.

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    • wow I can imagine! if he has some difficulty showing emotion, what was it that brought you two together initially?

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    • You 'test' guys?

    • Well, yeah. I just do little things that suggest that I might possibly like them and monitor their reactions. If they react the way I'm supposed to, I move on to more obvious things so I can get more obvious reactions. It builds and builds until either I or he feels comfortable asking the other out.

  • Yes. It twas awesome and scary but mostly awesome.

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  • most likely than not I think its a bad idea. but I also think it depends on how long you've known them, because I dated a guy that I've known for years and he never used to be moody. then ironically when we started dating, he was always really negative, always complaining, and I know he's depressed even if he won't admit it. I'm still dealing with it. It gets really frustrating, even if we aren't dating anymore, because I still feel like I should be there for him. ughhh :/ so yeah, maybe you shouldn't if that's what you wanna know.

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  • no but I don't like it when someone can change from one mood to the next very quickly. It's frightening.

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  • dont do it man don't do it hahaha

    i had a friend who did and she wen through hell with her girlfriend. don't recommend

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  • A rich sociopath, does that qualify?

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  • nah sorry mate :)

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  • maybe it is hard and it isn't for everyone you just have to be careful and sensitive. I have depression and it is really hard to date or fall for someone when you hate yourself at times or you have low self esteem.

    I find it hard to open up to people but don't think of it as something you don't want do deal with... if that was the case then no one would ever love a person like me.

    I am loving and kind and caring I would do anything for some one I love what I ask for in return is the same as any other person. I just need more reinsurance that you love me and that you won't hurt me. I need a shoulder to cry on some times more than others and yeah I can be irrational but I never intend to do these things to hurt the person I love. And if I hurt myself don't think I did it to hurt you or that I did it because I didn't love you. If I do something bad it is because I'm scared or confused or in pain. When I do these things just remember to be patient and love me.

    Don't think of people who have mood disorder as something they can control or get over. Yeah sometimes we get mad or upset but remember we can't help it anymore than someone with cancer can help it. Also never call us crazy... there is nothing more painful then feeling like your a freak... we already feel bad no need to make it worse.

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    • A point that might help is to push yourself more open up to people, including potential love interests, about your struggles, I know it's hard but you will be surprised at how forgiving people are ... they will still like you and want nothing but to help you and to see you succeed. The worst thing about depression is the feeling of being all alone. You need to attack that head-on because people were never meant to be alone, it's how we are wired.

  • My boyfriend has had depression for a while. I understand because I have suffered from depression, but at the same time I sometimes lose my patience with him. It can be really tough trying to have a functioning relationship when one person is not functioning very well. But I love him so I'm just trying to help him get through it and be there for him

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  • It is tough, especially if you start developing feelings for the person. Been there done that.

    I'm not sure if he had a mood disorder. I do know he was crushed by an ex-girlfriend and what I could gather from his family, went through quite a depression.

    I felt during the short time we dated I that maybe he had a undiagnosed mood disorder because it was one heck of a emotional roller coaster ride for me. One moment I was "dear" the next he made me feel as if I was bothering him. I had no idea what I did, what had happened? I was always questioning me and my actions. I was always trying to change me, do I need to look better, do I need to have a more positive attitude, less positive. Do I need to treat him better...WHAT DO I NEED TO DO TO MAKE HIM FEEL THE SAME ABOUT ME EVERYDAY?

    It was maddening! I stepped back and thought...it's not me, it's him. I can't keep changing who I am. He obviously has feelings for me but he needs to get help with his emotions and why he doesn't think he can find happiness.

    If you do get involved be prepared maybe read up on the disorder. Know what you will be getting into.

    Good luck.

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    • thanks for sharing, sounds like an experience for both of you. One the one hand, he has got you questioning yourself. On the other hand, he seems was probably working work hard to get his symptoms under control and try not to make your life a complete nightmare.

      Read more: Bipolar Disorder Forum - Thinking of Dating Someone That Is Bipolar? Read Here First. link

  • I dated a man who claimed to be bipolar. I didn't know for a while, but once I found out, everything he'd been doing made sense. He was ALL over the place, emotionally. One day, he told me that he was still seeing other people and liked things casual and literally the next day told me he was upset because I only texted him "when I was bored". And also said he was upset because I hadn't talked about introducing him to my parents yet. It was constantly hot and cold like that.

    Needless to say, that particular situation didn't work out for me. But obviously, individuality comes into play... and the severity of the disorder matters as well. But it will be more work than a relationship with someone without those problems.

    Of course, there really is no black and white answer to something like this... it's all variable. Did it work for me and that guy? No. Does that mean I'll never date someone with a mood disorder again? Of course not. It all depends on the man and what we're able to work through together.

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    • thanks for sharing your experience. sounds like cyclothymia to me (constant ups and downs), a true rollercoaster of sorts. you must have enjoyed it at some level though (or at least had been able to tolerated it for a while) since you aren't excluding the moody ones from you future repertoire of boyfriends, am I right?

    • Well, like anyone would, I enjoyed the ups, ha ha - wanted to kill him during the downs. But we didn't last long, only a month. I honestly felt like I was dating a woman constantly on her period, lol. No matter what I said, he'd get mad. He got mad and didn't talk to me for days because I said I wasn't dating anyone else. I just didn't know how to deal with that kind of drama. Drama is a really big turn off for me, in boyfriends AND friends. In the end, it was just too much drama.

  • I have a mild behavior disorder. I take a low dose medication to treat it. It is heraditory. Mine manifests itself by irritability in the mornings. Or when I feel pressure I snap.

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    • thanks for sharing. if you don't mind me asking, how does your condition affect relationships ... or is it too mild to be an real issue?

    • It doesn't per se. Symptoms appears like getting out of the wrong side of the bed. I snap and argue. It is not detrimental to a relationship if treated with low dose med. It doesn't happen regularly at all but rather a few times a week.

  • I think that not all women are like that they are just going through something

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What Guys Said 7

  • Have I dated girls who I knew were officially diagnosed with an actual mood disorder? No. But I've dated girls who are messed up for whatever reasons. Perhaps they did have something and didn't tell me.

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    • Or they may have never been diagnosed. it seems that the girls and guys who volunteered answers here have been pretty forthright with their partners about their conditions.

  • yes but more of a FWB. But there was something hot about it. not making like of the disorders. But I had the luxury of being able to distance myself when it was on the down side.

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  • I never dated this girl, mainly because I was afraid of what could happened. I mean she was so confusing, one day she could be all over me, another day she would change her behavior and blow me off? Wth? She also wanted to talk whenever she wanted to, not if I took the initiative. She was a very confusing person and for that I developed sort of a fear with her, because I had no idea what to expect from her or what to do.

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  • never dated anyone, just rejections after another.

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  • I think all women have some kind of mood disorder...

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  • I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and I've found it's easier for me to just avoid any close relationships with anybody. I've focused the addictive side of my personality towards lifestyle choices that are beneficial. Relationships are just too rocky and difficult for me to deal with or understand, so I just decided one day not to subject myself to it. Sure, at times the loneliness can be rough, but those are the days I redirect my energies towards my "addictions" two fold. Double down and power through the times of loneliness or just utter voids. Work on making myself happy and okay with the life I have, not making my happiness based on others (which will inevitably fail). As I get closer to that, my self image is becoming less and less centered on how others perceive me and what others think. I think the first step is finding stability/stable self image and self worth. Then maybe I can work on those other areas.

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    • glad you are taking strong steps forward to improving yourself and wish you the best of luck in reaching your goals

  • Wait, isn't that all women?

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    • "Wahhhhh I have my period"

      "Wahhhhh shoes aren't on sale anymore"

      "Wahhhhh they don't have the purse I want"

      "Why are you looking at that girl"

      "No"

      "No"

      "No"

      "Well, when I said no, I really meant yes"

      "What do you mean you don't know what I'm thinking!?"

      ...Women. You can't live with them, and you can't kill them.

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    • Don't trust anything that bleeds for 7 days and doesn't die. Quote my father instilled in me quite some time ago. Became evident when my mom divorced my dad for the pool man she was sleeping with for the past 2 years of their marriage while he was at work. Needless to say, I haven't spoken to my mother since. Your gender is evil.

    • I love AU lol

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