He hasn't kissed me yet..?

I've been talking to/ hanging out with this guy for a couple of weeks now, and we've been on 4 or 5 dates now (some of them were just hanging out at one of our places, so I'm not sure if they're technically "dates", but whatever). We hold hands and he puts his arm around me and he even gave me a neck massage because my neck was hurting really badly. I feel like we've been having a really good time together, yet we haven't kissed yet. I'm not sure if I'm doing something wrong or maybe he's just nervous. I've considered going for it myself, but I've never done that before, so I'm not sure. He seems confused every time I try to help pay for something when we go out, so I'm not sure what his position would be if I made the first move. I'm also the one who initiated our talking by giving him my number, so a petty part of me kind of wants him to make this move. Any thoughts?

I'm 20, he's 22, if that helps.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Get really close to his face and that should give him the hint. Lean in close and look him in the eyes and smile. It will happen. There have been times when I have held back kissing a girl for a few dates only because her body language didn't seem like she was ready for it. If you're ready for it, signal that by getting up in his business. If you get really close, it is hard for him NOT to get the hint.

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What Guys Said 2

  • What he said :L

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  • First I'd advise not counting favors. Or moves. It is habit forming and twenty years from now may lead to someone shouting in a McDonald's: "Why don't you ever ask if I need a side of mustard, you son of a bitch! You always get one for yourself. Why not me?"

    I would say he's not comfortable with it yet. I'm Mister Obvious.

    He's not comfortable with the kiss because he's not sure if he likes you that way or not. He's been the target of a girl who asks guys out, and even in these times it might leave his head spinning a little. He's got to figure out if he would have asked you out, if he'd seen you first.

    Seems to be the only advice I'm giving lately, but try ignoring him. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Works sometimes. Let him say he'll call or text you, and say something understated in response, like "okay, talk to you then." Not: "Okay, when are you going to call me?" or "I can't wait to hear from you again." Act like it doesn't matter one way or the other.

    Sometimes meeting a girl in a different way than normal can confuse us. Hell, moving my razor three feet from where I put it can leave me foggy headed all day. We only use one half of our higher brains, when scanned, versus women's balanced use of both. Look at football. What are there, maybe a hundred plays? Don't quote me I was too skinny to play so I don't know. The point is we keep doing the same old thing over and over and when a woman offers us something different, it's a shock to our system.

    So, play it mellow, lead him along gently, on a loose leash. He'll get around to the kiss. Who knows, maybe he's never kissed a girl. Mellow out, and back off, and then you'll know.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I agree with TheDigitalSaint. He needs some confirmation from you. Do you know anything about his previous relationship(s)? Is there the possibility that he's not really a kisser for some reason? I feel for ya girl! I would be waiting for it too!

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  • I think this day and age you can kiss him first, then he'll know where he stands and you'll see how he feels. I say go for it hun life's to short.

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