Guys, why are most of you threatened by dating a girl that loves labels?

Okay, I am a fairly independent woman that has been fortunate to grow up with many fine things and opportunities.

I buy designer labels for myself and do not expect others to yet whenever I date a guy he always complains that he feels like he can't make me happy or satisfied because he doesn't have money to buy me things I like.

I'm not a snob, on of the best gifts I ever got from an ex was a wooden box from the dollar tree that he polished and waxed and put a seashell we found on our first vacation together in it. I still have it and we broke up over a year ago. He always said I only liked it so I wouldn't hurt his feelings but I truly did like it.

So why am I being judged for what I buy? I don't throw it in peoples faces or even talk about it. But like for example with one guy he was appalled when I went shopping for new bag, shoes, clothes, jewelry and makeup and spent $600 in a day. I had just got my first real job and was treating myself. Yet I get put down for that.

So how am I supposed to act then?

Updates:
I should also ad that I tend to go for blue collar, hard working types. The patriarch of my family was a CEO and VP of a major electronics company that went out of business a few years ago and after dating the preppy, yuppy, country club type I realized that wasn't for me.


I do like labels and I do like my lifestyle but I also work on my car, can shoot better than most guys (I have a 12 gauge) and I enjoy getting down and dirty. Its not like I'm some prep school bred troglodyte.
I am just as comfortable at a formal charity benefit in a ballgown as I am on a fishing boat baiting ahook and drinking a few beers. For eexample haha

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm not threatened by girls that love labels, I just think they value the wrong things in life. That wooden box with the seashell that you value meant something, there are plenty of other things in life that mean something like art supplies to create something, an instrument to play music, a plant for a garden, or whatever. People that are living a full life tend to pay for their necessities first, put away some for retirement/a rainy day, and then with their disposable purchase items related to what they love to do, and aspects of their life that is a part of them. If you burn all your money on the opulence of expensive clothing and handbags, it says what you value is being seen. Having the latest most popular purse is more important then something with real meaning.

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    • *disposable income

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    • No, I worded my post at that people who burn their money on that are boring. It's shallow, and lacks depth... If that's what you enjoy in life, that's what you enjoy... It's just different then what I value, and thus why I'm turned off by girls that spend a lot on things like that. It's a conflict of purpose I guess you could say.

    • For example I use to talk to someone who said they do one big shopping trip a year for clothing. They get what they want, and most of the rest of the year they don't really worry about it. She loved to play piano, and said she hated going to the art store, because she always wants to buy all the cool things they have there and was afraid to spend too much. That's passion. Her purchasing interests revolve around her life passions, and that is very very interesting to me.

What Guys Said 5

  • People have expectations and make assumptions. A LOT. So I think all you have to do is make clear that you don't have these expectations.

    But here is a little bit on social dynamics. Your partner wants to make you happy. But if you tell him only that he doesn't have to buy you things that only leaves him with what not to do. And buying gifts is the easiest way. So if you mention what you would like, that helps people a lot. If the task is clear we can achieve something. Do something right.

    So communicating what would make you happy (instead of what wouldn't) makes all the difference for someone to feel like they can make you happy.

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  • date guys that aren't so insecure?

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  • Still shallow. You should find a "CEO" boyfriend. Hopefully he will keep up with your shallowness.

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    • How is that shallow? I am not judging anyone or expecting anyone to buy me things. And if you read the whole post you would notice that I'm not attracted to the CEO type.

  • I'll date you lol

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  • Women are hypergamous. You will complain if he can't get you the things that you are used to having. No need to lie about it. It's not necessarily that he is intimidated, it's just that he knows most women don't want that. Just the way things are.

    He was appalled because most guys don't get it. We know that you can look good and fashionable without those things and you are spending a lot more than needed because of the name on them. What most guys don't understand is that their opinion isn't the important one. It's for other girls to see. It's to rub their noses in it because you have x, y, and z and they wish they did.

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What Girls Said 3

  • People like that often come off as stuck up. It's often perceived as, girls who dress nice want someone similar.

    For example, I'm sure as hell not going to hit on a guy wearing designer clothes because I'll assume he focuses mostly on physical appearance, and will judge me solely on that. It might not be true, but that's how it comes off. Shit I won't even approach a guy who looks too trendy because I am not trendy myself.

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  • It scares the guys because they don't think they can afford you.

    They imagine that to stay with you they will be expected to purchase you equally expensive things.

    You go girl! Just keep on enjoying life. What else can you do?

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  • You should date guys who have money like you seem to.you can't change men's attitudes about money.if you have things that indicate high status and expensive and he knows he can't afford things like that, then he's gonna feel intimidated.nothing you can do but date higher on the income scale and deal with men who aren't intimidated by what you have

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