So I started seeing this guy just a few weeks back and Saturday he decided to come over to hang out and watch some DVDs. He was at my place for about an hour when he told me about some movies he had at home and suggested to go and get them and bring them back to watch. He only lives about 5 minutes away and said he would be back shortly. Well 2 hours past and he still wasn't back so I sent him a message. After another hour or so I rang because I was starting to worry. All the next day I continued to ring to see if he was okay but still did not get a response. The day after I rang about 6am from an anonymous number and he answered saying he had a change of mind about coming back over and was going to call me about it, which to me is a massive cop out. I feel really let down by his actions as I was awake for two days straight wondering if he was okay. Why do some people think this kind of behavior is appropriate? If he didn't want to come back he could have made up some excuse about not feeling well or at least have answered my calls, especially if I texted asking if he was okay about 3 times.
Most Helpful Guy
A lot of people do these cop outs (actually, it is more women than men who do), because they hold onto the erroneous belief that just cutting someone out and placing them in a position where they have to read between the lines to get it spares that other person's feelings, so to say, by avoiding confrontation and being told the hard truths in his/her face. This is, of course, coupled with the self-serving belief that the copper-outer, for lack of a better word, is acting nobly by not hurting the persons.
This is, of course, utter rubbish - there is nothing noble about just going AWOL on someone in the vain hope that he/she will 'get it'. It is actually quite childish and rather cowardly.
Any man/woman worth his/her salt will go through the short-term unpleasanties of telling another in the face what that another may not necessarily wish to hear, for the long-term benefit of being civil, acting with honour, and doing things properly.
So your man was, well, childish and cowardly. No sweat - I don't think you need that in your life, so good riddance.