Single mom dating. Advise is appreciated

Almost all single women in my age range already have kid(s). And I don't have anything against that. To be honest, I think kids are a blessing, and I'd like a family. But I've never dated a single mom before. Any advise other than being honest and upfront: I'm not looking to date "for fun". I'm looking for a legitimate relationship.

FYI: I'm going back to school on the GI Bill, and a woman in my chem lab gave me her #. I couldn't date her at the time (I was seeing someone else). But I can now, and told her I lost her # and asked if I could have it again and asked if we could hang out after finals. She said yes, and gave me her #. We had met from a previous conversation at the beginning of the semester. She said she was new to town, etc.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Oh boy, you're looking to seriously date a single mom. Okay man, if you were my brother, I would beat the living daylights out of you first. And then sit your ass down and tell you these 6 Reasons to NEVER date a Single Mother. It's one thing to have fun with them WITH a condom, but an extremely stupid idea to date one. Here's why:

    1: She decided to have a kid without a husband. This demonstrates terrible, selfish values. It also shows that she thinks of men as sperm donors and child support payers, NOT husbands & fathers. What will happen if you knock her up? Get ready to pay up for a kid that you won’t get to be a real dad to.

    2: In some states, you can be responsible for child support by just living with her. I don’t want to pay for kids that aren’t mine. Do you?

    3: False allegations of child abuse. It isn’t likely, but I don’t want to take that chance. Getting branded with a big “M” on your forehead (For Molester) will WRECK YOUR LIFE. It will never go away. Too big a risk.

    4: Relationship aren’t easy as it is. Add a minor child and it really complicates the issue. Do you want to deal with her kid(s) too? You won’t be their dad and they will know it. Their mom already f***ed up their life by not having a dad for them, and is f***ing it up more by bringing in “Revolving door boyfriends” into their life.

    5: Lots of single moms have financial problems. You will be obligated to help pay for sitters, food, braces, on and on. For children that aren’t yours. Get the credit card out!

    6: There is NO reason to date one. Millions of women in this country are single with no kids, and in every age range. Go younger if you have to. Don’t waste your time with a woman that has PROVEN that she doesn’t want a husband for her and dad for her kids. Do you think she will change her mind for you? That she will forget her utter contempt for husbands and fathers just for you? Sure she will.

    I run into single mothers once in a while, and when “I have a kid” is revealed, that’s the end of the conversation for me. I will be polite but I will still walk off, because I don’t want anything to do with them. And neither will any other smart man.


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What Girls Said 3

  • I am a single mom and my greatest request would be total honesty. Do not waste your time if you see for intense that you won't get along with the kids. The best thing you can do is walk away if that is the case as she will resent you more later if you stay and the kids get hurt. It is a very difficult situation I usually wait until I am sure that the guy is someone I would like to date before introducing my kids.

  • moms are defiantly more careful with who they date, because you will also be apart of her child's life. the obvious would be get in good with the child, if she sees he/she likes you it will defiantly make you look good,

    • I was thinking the other way around. Go on a couple dates to see about compatibly with the mom and go from there. Otherwise, what if me and her kid did develop a bond; and me and the mom broke up? 3 broken hearts. And the kid is too young to understand, and emotionally immature to handle it.

  • Move slowly and don't rush into things. See if she wants that to and if you're compatible


What Guys Said 1

  • Move very slow, and with caution. Single moms are a different breed of cat. They typically have a lot going on in their life, especially emotionally. There can be a lot of false vibe s given...and many ups and downs in the relationship.