What would be the difference between hanging out with someone of the opposite sex and dating.

sometimes it can be ambiguous.

what makes something a date or just hanging out. (apart from intentions).


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Personal space is a big one. When you're new friends with someone, you're not snuggling, putting your arm around her shoulders, taking naps, etc. If you've been friends for a good long while, that's a different story (depending on you and your friend), but for the most part, you don't sit right next to each other on the couch.

    When you hug, you don't do the looooooong, slightly wandering-petting hug if you're just friends. One arm is totally kosher, two arm SQUEEZE is fine, as is the grab and rock back and forth ridiculously - all show fondness, but are not overly intimate.

    No expensive gifts. My friends and I will grab a thing of someone's favorite candy because they're down or give them a bottle of nail polish we thought they'd like, but anything bigger, particularly from a guy, is very unsettling. Gifts are also a rare usage item. If you're giving little things all the time and never getting anything in return, it's weird.

    You don't lose at games to make her feel better (or him), you don't primp and freak out about what you're going to wear, you're allowed to fart, burping contests usually happen at some point, and you're totally allowed to veto movies when you go out - all perks of not-dating.

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What Girls Said 17

  • I'm pretty sure that it's only a date if you officially make it one. "Wanna go out sometime?" and "let's hang out sometime" are totally different, the first being a definite asking-out sentence while the latter is more of a casual thing that doesn't necessarily mean anything. The setting kind of plays a part in it as well, like going to a fancy restaurant versus watching a movie at home. The fancy restaurant is more formal and date-y, something you might only do with special people, while watching a movie at home is something you can pretty much do with whoever you want.

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  • I can see where this question applies um

    I had a close guy friend, he would always pay when we go out and for the longest time I didn't realize he liked me. and would always flatter me.

    it got to a point where he bought me gifts and before then we would just 'hang out' at the mall or whatever, but he grew more attracted to me.

    I guess to myself, it's not a date, unless both are attracted to each other and the borders between friends is crossed. something is agreed to...otherwise it's friendship.

    in my case I thought we were friends, but later found out he was pursuing me. so it depends on the situation too of course.

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  • I was raised in a house that believed, "If he's paying for you, you're dating. If not, you're friends with benefits." I don't agree with this so much. If by hanging out you mean, going to the mall or something, you're just spending time with a friend. Nothing more. If by hanging out, you mean hooking up but not "officially" dating, there's no difference aside from the title and maybe one more both partners lack feelings and are just "friends with benefits." If you're dating, both parties tend to have feelings for each other, would not like to see the other with someone else, and would consider being in a full out relationship. Also, dating has more "requirements". Maybe you'd hang out with someone with no morals, no future, or someone ugly in your opinion you because they're nice and you have fun being around them, but you wouldn't actually want to be with this person romantically because they're not reaching your "standard" or someone who you'd like to show to your family.

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  • Hanging out means... you don't see the person of the opposite sex as attractive or you just see them as a "brother" or a "sister" and you guys don't flirt really and just see each other as "bros"

    Date - means you both kinda like each other and now you're taking it to the next level.. there's a small amoutn of nrvousness, excitement and hoping for a potential date, kiss or relationship or all 3

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    • Well, what if I find my friend attractive but don't want to take it to some other level? (that a man/woman is attractive doesn't mean its girlfriend material)

  • Who pays, and if the person who initiates says "do you want to hang out"" or "Do you wanna go out?" I don't consider it a date.

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  • The default is hanging out. To make it dating you actually have to make it know and be upfront about it. This is really funny question actually because my guy friend was telling me and my friend he was dating two girls and by the end of the conversation he realized he wasn't dating either of them. lol

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  • You tell her yourself, or she would ask you. Otherwise it is just a hanging out.

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  • Think of it like you're hanging out with one of your guy friends. If you two go to see a movie you definitely would not cuddle with him or let him kiss you. You two would just be normal and sit at a certain distance. There is no big difference between the two but it's all about how far you intend the outing to go.

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  • depends on the intentions, do you want to be close to that person? holding their hand, putting your arm around them, maybe even getting a possible kiss?

    biggest differences is would you do the same activities with your friends that are the same sex as you would with this person? if not , it could d be considered more of a date.

    examples- sitting out on a blanket looking at the stars, eating out at a restaurant.

    the lines are a little blurred, I get confused sometimes but it's all the intentions of the meeting.

    date= expectations of flirting, possible affection, or kiss.

    hanging out= no expectations other than having fun.

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  • Well when I hang with my guy friends we make fun of each other tell them how crusty they are and just have a different type of "fun" then what I have with my boyfriend. The romance I guess. There are none of those "I wan't to tear those clothes off you" thoughts when I speak with my guy friends.

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  • Intent, persoanl space, venue, general effort put into the outing, perhaps topics of coversation...it's pretty obvious, when you're on a date you generally know it. lol.

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  • Good question. I'm confused when it comes to my situation too. I've like my guy friend for more than a year now. We've been friends for 2 years and hang out a lot with a couple of our friends. Lately though we've been going out just two of us and I don't know why, we kept it a secret from our friends... So anyway, in a group I'm constantly teased and we banter a lot but alone, our conversations are nicer. We never made it clear that it was a date. We just casually ask each other out for dinner. The restaurant we go to is a casual place to eat so not necessary to dress up. No hugs, no kiss :( I think he likes me too but I'm not sure. First time he asked me out for dinner was last New Year's Eve. it was so spontaneous. The 'date' ended with an awkward handshake and a happy new year. lol. So is that a buddies hangout or a date?

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    • It's hard to tell, but unless one of you makes a move or tells the other that you want it to be more than just a hangout, it's not going to progress. Why don't you be the one to ask? Next time he asks you to dinner, just ask if this is just a hangout or date. This puts it on him to make that call. Either he'll answer and you'll know right then, or he'll try and put it back on you and ask what you want, and if he does that then that means he wants it to be a date.

    • Thanks. I should get some balls to do that. lol. I might just ask him if it's a date one of these days and hope it won't turn out awkward later. I think I can manage to turn it into something of a tease... Will that make him not want to ask me out again? We tease each other a lot. Anyway, I'm sorry to be asking my question on someone else's post. Thanks for your input.

  • Well, you have to know if you're starting out with a friendly vibe or a sexual sort of vibe from her.

    You should also be aware of the body language you're giving each other, the sorts of conversations you're having.

    Even then, one of you MAY perceive it as a date, the other as just hanging out. REly on how long smiles/looks/touching last.

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  • Dating has more strict and ridge rules for me, hanging out doesn't for example id hang out with a younger guy but not date him

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  • the difference= attraction. And the point of the hanging out/dating would be to grow closer and get to know each other, if you are hanging out with a friend, you are still bonding but not playing the 20 questions game more like playing xbox or something.

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  • hanging out is more like bumming around...going to each others house or just relaxing more

    a date is like going out to a restaurant or a movie...or it can also be when you JUST met and are getting to know each other.

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  • The feelings and the chemistry

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think if it's a date, then both people should know it's a date. You should be clear that you want it to be a date when asking them to go out. That way there is no confusion. Things such as body language, topic of conversation, being affectionate. I think it gets difficult when you are not on the same page as the other person. As in either you or her want or hope it is a date, but the other person either doesn't know or didn't want it to be a date.

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  • The difference, in general, is that dating is hanging out with someone you have romantic interest in and you let them know of your intentions, i.e. you let them know you like them and would like to take them out on a date. Hanging out is just that, hanging out. There doesn't have to be any feelings there. For me personally, being on a date is when I have to be on my best behavior and making a good first impression to the girl. When I am hanging out with a girl I have no interest in, I don't have to worry about doing such things that turns the girl off. I can behave in such ways and say things that I wouldn't do or say on dates.

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