Why do some independent women scare off some men

I always hear men complain that they hate clingy women, and that they like women who don't always want to be around them. And yet, some of the men I've dated don't seem to like how independent I am. Isn't it better that I can do things on my own without having to lean on a guy for support for everything? If I needed a guy to do everything for me, or to be around me all the time I wouldn't have survived the last seven years I've lived on my own.

One guy I work with was complaining about his girlfriend wants to be with him everyday. And yet a couple weeks later, he was telling a couple of the guys how they got in a fight because she wanted to drive to Toronto by herself, as if she isn't capable of doing it on her own. They've only been dating for about six months. What does he think happened to her when she went to Toronto before they dated? From what I heard, she goes to Toronto a lot.


0|0
0|6

Most Helpful Guy

  • "If I needed a guy to do everything for me..."

    There is a broad middle ground between a clingy woman and one who is so independent she leaves a guy feeling unimportant. Guys do like to feel needed too. And there is a category of women who seem to be so in love with the idea that they don't need a man that they come off as having a chip on their shoulder.

    It's probably not accurate to say men are scared off. More turned off, I'd say.

    0|0
    0|0
    • My point was when I started that sentence was I wouldn't have gotten through life the way I have. I even said that: " If I needed a guy to do everything for me, or to be around me all the time I wouldn't have survived the last seven years I've lived on my own. " All I meant was, I wouldn't have achieved anything in my life if I just sat around and waited for a guy to do it for me. I feel flattered when they want to help, and I will let them. One of my guy friends volunteered to put my air

    • Show All
    • I want to be able to raise my kid and not think that I won't be able to raise my kid just because the dad walked out, or died, or something. Although that example isn't too good since I don't want kids, but you never know what happens between now and if I met a guy I loved. If he really wanted a kid, I'd give him one. But anyway, I think you deserve BA, so I'm giving it to you.

    • Thank you for the BA!

What Guys Said 5

  • Its look like this guy has a controlling side to him, wants everything his own way in the relationship. he can't have his cake and eat it. guy's do like independent women, I certainly do. Most young people of today have trust issues, because there is so much cheating going round, and friends telling each other this and that person is cheating. the media has a big influence, you hear all the celebrity couple cheating on other. Lets face it, at some point that is going to mess with your head when comes to having relationships.

    I think this guy has trust issues, as well as controlling issues as well. someone needs to tell him too make up his mind.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I have no idea why some men are like this because I would actually prefer that. I have more of an independent personality as well.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Those guys who hate independent women must be Control Freaks, and think they Possess or Own Women.

    I see nothing wrong with Independent Women, but some of those women, like rubbing power in a mans face, and try to put him down to prove a point.

    0|0
    0|0
  • He might have a trust issue. Women do cheat as well, you know

    0|0
    0|0
    • I never said they didn't. I don't where you got the assumption that I thought only men cheat. I never said anything about cheating in my post. I know a girl who cheats on her army boyfriend all the time, and have even told him but he doesn't believe me. So I don't approve of cheating if you think that. I would never cheat.

    • Show All
    • You could very well be right. And if he does have a trust issue, then he should break up with her. If that is the case. It doesn't make sense to date someone if you're scared that they're going to cheat every time they go off somewhere by themselves. It's just a stressful situation for him to be in, and why should be put himself through stress when he is a single father? His wife died four years ago. It can't be easy for him as it is without added stress.

    • Then tell him all of this. Be HONEST!

  • Guys don't like girls that are too clingy. They also don't like the "I don't need a man" types either. You have to have a balance. I think a lot of us want to be needed. I know I would like that.

    0|0
    0|0
    • And I think the guy under me has a point about your friend. It might not be the case of course, but I don't blame him if it is.

What Girls Said 0

No girls shared opinions.

Loading...