I thought I was over him, but now I feel broken-hearted all over again-what do I do?

We broke up exactly one month ago today. For about a week it was hell, all I did was cry, and work because work was the only thing that kept my mind off him, but as soon as I was out I would start crying again. Well, I told myself I needed to stop acting like this and be strong and get over him. So I did! I was being so strong and I was truly feeling happy again. Then I went on this awful date on Friday, right before I went out he texted me. I was shocked. I didn't answer till after the date because I didn't want it to mess with my head, but regardless the date was just awful. Anyways to get to the point, I was fine and doing great but now I feel like I did the first week after the break up. I don't want to go through all of this again :( I miss him so much.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I am too going through the same thing. I broke up with my ex I was okay/happy. I was so proud of myself I'm doing so well at not contacting him, crying over him or anything else. I bumped into him a month after we broke up and the feelings came back. I also went on a date the next day and it got much worse.

    Often, when we break up with someone that we loved or had strong feelings for, and start dating soon after ( 1months is nothing! ) we will compare the new partner to our old one. We can't stop it, it's just the thing our brain does. Your ex had something your new partner doesn't, and when you realize that, you will miss him a lot more.

    You obviously aren't ready to date again, and as you can see it makes things worse so you should definitely stop if you haven't already. Listen, one month after a break up is nothing! People get back together after a month, two or three. That's the time that exes should use to think about the past relationship and see if they will miss each other.

    Your ex texted you, what did he say? Do you still talk? There is possibility that he wants you back. Maybe you two need to meet up and reconsider.

    Even if you won't get back together, you are strong enough to handle it, and as you can see you are not in this alone! Best of luck girl

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    • yeah he texted me saying "you look pretty" I was so confused, but he said that he saw me driving down the main road of our town, even tho I didn't... We talked a little bit after that just about how classes were going, small talk. I haven't talked to him since. Thank you for all the great advice by the way I appreciate it so much :)

What Guys Said 2

  • Well there is that really old saying: "there is nothing as whole as a broken heart". You will feel better if you don't fight the pain, but accept it as an necessary process for personal growth. Witch it absolutely is. Being strong is by the way. not withstand rejecting the pain but endure it.

    I had the same thing in December. I thought I was over someone but, we meet again and everything starts again. because I was just denying the pain in the first place.

    Pain is the best possibility to think and maybe change some things about our selfs. And that was exactly what I did and now I am a lot better.

    I had the maybe advance, that I knew exactly what I had to think and change about my own person. So if you have no idea, you maybe ask again.

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  • Just stop thinking about him. Keep yourself busy.

    Meet new friends to keep him off your mind.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I wish I had better advice. I am going thought the same thing. With time it gets easier. Sometimes when you go out on a date and you know that you have no desire for it to go any further than that night you go home and immediately think of you ex. It's a normal feeling, just start doing things that make you happy. Girls night in/out, a new hair cut, take up a new hobby ect... All of these distractions will over time make it easier.

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  • I am in a rollar coaster realationship. We are not broken up but he slowed things down. I cry and cry a couple of days then I'm OK. When we see each other I'm fine than he leaves and I'm crushed again I don't know when ill see him, so yes this kind of behavior is torturing. The more you allow yourself to hear from him or see him takes that much longer to heal. Yes giving you advice I'm trying to follow it as well its hard. I tried to date and I can't do the rebound it made me feel worse so I know how you feel. Time does get easier if you don't pick up his calls and its tempting, but it will help you move on.

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  • Girl, keep busy. Get a life. Meet new friends, find a new hobby. It is what it is. Remember: You have a life and you want to give your ex the impression that you're busy, healthy and others desire you as well. This is how you set healthy boundaries for yourself, earn respect from others and get others to treat you with fairness and kindness. You're young. Keep moving. Time will ease your pain. Be strong.

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  • I was going through the same thing. It was really tough to get over my past love then I made it then I fell under the same condition after the break up but trust me you'll get better with time. It will heal!

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