Do you talk about politics on the first date?

Just as the title asks. I usually want to talk about politics on the first date to get it out of the way. To me, issues like gay rights, gun control, energy, and education are more of moral issues than they are political issues, and I want to be sure I'm not wasting my time on someone who has totally opposite values of me.

But on the other hand, my roommate said she never really asks her dates about politics and usually just has the good luck of dating guys who have the same views as her.

Do you think it's OK to talk about politics on the first date? If not, at what point would you ask?

  • Yes
    16% (16)17% (12)16% (28)Vote
  • No
    84% (86)83% (58)84% (144)Vote
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Updates:
I don't know why this shows up under the "sexuality" category when I tried to select "dating" as the category - sorry about that!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't, because I try to imagine those things aren't deal breakers to me.

    If they are deal breakers to you, then go ahead and raise them.

    The reason people normally advise them not to raise them is that raising them early suggests (in your case, correctly) that they are very important to you, and almost certainly, most people will not agree with you on all of them, and that will be the end of things.

    Which is what you want, right? If they aren't in line with your thoughts, why waste your time?

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What Guys Said 25

  • I do 100% agree with you.

    People don't understand how much politics weather they like it or not, controls their entire life.

    I also do 100% that gay rights, gun control, energy, and education are more of moral issues than they are political issues, only because the U.S. Constitution does not authorize the government power to control those aspects.

    But I would say, I would initiate a political conversation on the first date. Why, because even when I try to take the stress free route and not bring up a political conversation when not on a date, it still somehow gets brought up in the first place other than by me, and I have to jump right into it.

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  • I do, but it's something that should only be discussed in the right setting. I don't think it's wrong to show interest in someone else's moral standards, especially someone you might consider having an intimate relationship with. It is important to keep it a bit casual though.

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  • Depends. If you met at a rally or a protest or anythinglike that then sure. Otherwise, I say avoid it

    I like politics a lot. I even work in it. But I wouldn't santo offend a first date by bringing it up. If its brought up by her, an sure

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  • Well, usually it's the man who wants to talk about politics and it's the woman who would rather not.

    I'm interested in politics, and I don't mind talking about it at all, but I would only do so if I knew the other person was interested.

    I'm capable of having a political discussion without yelling, raising my voice, being judgmental, being rude, or being dogmatic or bigoted. But I also want to make sure that the other person on the date with me isn't so sensitive that one disagreement would erupt into an argument.

    I would talk about politics on the first date if it came up in conversation, and I would talk about it briefly and move on (unless she was really interested in the conversation).

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  • No, but I can if I wanted to. I'm the type of guy that can talk about politics all day long. This makes two types of people uncomfortable: People that aren't as knowledgeable as I am, and people that like to avoid conflict. With that said, I hold back and try to keep my opinions to myself unless I feel the other person is comfortable enough for me to share my ideas with.

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  • I have to agree on politics to date someone. Many times how someone views politics determines who they are and how they act. Not always but there is a trend. Someone who has no opinion on it would be okay too.

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  • Oh, I always do.

    Mostly cause I date crazy women and if their views wildly disagree with my own there is the distinct possibility of angry, violent sex.

    But I am not most guys.

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  • No bad idea, just imagine if you were a hardcore christian and he was an atheist? or what if you supported pro choice and you were pro life? you would hate him after the date

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  • not gonna lie even if all your moral values were the same as mine I would still think you are a little crazy for asking about this stuff on a first date and probably run away.

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  • A first date for me presupposes that they're Catholic (or are willing to be) and we're on the page. Politics isn't a very charming subject on a first date.

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  • As long as I want a second one then no , but if somehow it happens that I dislike her personality enough to not want to know her more then I may talk politics just to see how much of a deference we have .

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  • I've never dated but making sure the girl isn't a crazy right winger would seem to be pretty high up the list of priorities when determining if you want to go out with someone you've so far only judged on looks.

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  • A first date is not a time to talk about these things, unless you met at a rally about one. Let that come as the relationship develops.

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  • Not unless I was a politican or working on someones campain as my ocupation

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  • lol nope. teeeerrible idea.

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  • I should hope not. Maybe second third or fourth. But even then you might not have to ask as people will say certain things which will indicate their views.

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  • Hell No! I talk about nothing but compliments as I listen to her every word.

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  • Usually no, but if it comes up, I don't mind talking about it. It depends on how the conversations go.

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    • Also, I can see your mindset and it seems logical enough to me, best to get those things worked out. But then again, I never really date casually, I only ever go with friendship first and if it leads to more, great. So by then I usually know their political mind on things as they know mine.

  • Religion, sex and politics are the three most trollable subjects to not only talk about on a date, but also here on GAG. too many opinions about each of them and it'll only create a problem. why do that to yourself?

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  • >I'm not wasting my time on someone who has totally opposite values of me

    translation

    >hurr durr I don't want to be with someone who will make me think

    Also, anyone who supports gun control probably gets their only news about guns when tragedies happen. Statistics show that more guns = less crime.

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  • No, I wouldn't talk about politics on the first date, there's plenty more enjoyable things to talk about.

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  • I won't even talk about it in forever, so I won't even think about first date. Nor second or third.

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  • If I was dating, I wouldn't dream of it unless I wanted it to be the last date.

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    • Btw, I am very knowledgeable about politics for someone my age, and I have a good capacity to convey my arguments (aka a "liberal" to neo-cons), but politics is a terrible way to spend a date. Most girls are not interested in the slightest about real political talk, nor any sort of intellectual discussion. They want easy feel good moods, to know you can provide that off the bat, and that's all.

  • I never talk about politics ever

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  • No never but I will talk religion. I can get along with someone if I disagree politically a bit but if we are on different sides of the spectrum on religion then forget it. Talks of politics on the first date is not my idea of a good time anyway.

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What Girls Said 11

  • I don't unless I a) Met somebody at something political and we're obviously enough alike that it will be a discussion, not a fight or b) I've known somebody a while and know they're political opinion is much like my own.

    (I reallly dislike super debates where people refuse to acknowledge why the other person thinks the way they do. I tend to only discuss things with people unless I know we both are open minded enough to say things like "Oh, well that's interesting, here's what I think and why")

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  • I would probably save it until the 3rd or 4th date because that's when you start opening up more.. but sometimes I guess you can find out just by hangingo ut with them more and talking about those things if you're compatible... lol but I'd say become friends first that way you both aren't turned off by each others opinions lol...

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  • I prefer not to bring it up, but sometimes that means I end up going on a second, third, or more dates with a total wacko. I think it shouldn't be discussed on the first date but it should be discussed relatively soon.

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  • i don't initiate such topic but some who courted me before talk about it and I don't mind it at all.. actually any topic I'm game.. and besides I can always disagree in a nice way =)

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  • If it came up, why not? Is it something we have to hide? It is a no-no topic we'll never discuss?

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  • I don't only because it's not something I follow very much. However, I like talking about the things your aren't supposed to talk about on a first date, I think you can really get to know a person through their thoughts on politics, religion, relationships etc.

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  • No, I don't. Dates are supposed to be fun, not a time to examine the person THAT way only to let preconceived notions shape your opinion.

    I'll ask if it comes up, but I don't date guys based on their political beliefs.

    The only issues that would concern me are the persons beliefs on monogamy and whether they want marriage and children, because I'm not compromising that long term goal.

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  • No way! Lol. Even if I know the guy shares the same beliefs as me, I am a really passionate person and don't want him to see that side of me just yet ha

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  • Sure, why not?

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  • I say no! there are some things in this world that are SUPER controversial, and politics would be one thing unless you're SUPER open minded. You could be republican and they could be a hard core democrat and you could start off on the wrong foot. I say get to know them more then talk about it if you become closer. My Best Friend and I are completely opposite on politics but we're still super close and agree of lots of others things.

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  • That's not a good idea. You might start an argument

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