Did I chase him away by crying to him about an abusive ex on our 4th date

I opened up about my abusive ex on our 4th date and I broke down to tears and had him promise he won't do anything like that if we were to get into a relationship. I feel so stupid for doing that but the night we spoke via telephone he says he misses me I act emotional, but me and him are gonna work out and that I worry him when I speak that way, but he understands that I am young and I am a woman. How do I cancel off this naughty, needy behavior. I am not going to call him. I am suppose to sleep over at His place this Friday. I do not intend to have sex with him just cuddle and help him clean his damn room is it a bad idea? Then on Saturday we are going to resort to get a massage, swim in the pool then just relax until we get bored and get something to eat is that a good idea


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think your Saturday sounds good. I think sleeping over on the fifth date is...um questionable but entirely up to you two. As for the unloading on him.

    I think that if you have a good guy and a guy who is willing and wanting to hear this stuff it is OK, but it could definitely scare off a lot of men. I think most people know that there are demons/skeletons and dating histories that we'll have to deal with, but if after four dates this comes flooding out in an emotional storm I'd be a little consider that those skeletons are really a big hang-up and I'd wonder if they are really ready to be in a relationship. Nonetheless I personally would listen and try to be supportive and wouldn't end a relationship based on that convo alone however my antennae would be up to see if there is baggage going forward

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What Guys Said 2

  • Most guys don't like or can't stand women that are Emotional Wreck.

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    • I won't do it again and try to control my emotions and speak to someone else about it. He shouldn't be my therapist. We are still cool our next date's today. so I guess I have to grow TF up and let my past go, but thanks

    • Right one won't pass you by.

  • I hoped you picked a good guy because honestly crying on our 4th date. "Get me the hell outta here!" He better be very understanding. As for sleeping over at his house. Really? sleeping over? after only a 4th date? with no sex? Why not just kick him in the balls and run away? Sleeping over with no sex is a huge BITCH move. I would think a girl is a slut if it's been that short a time, because If she's sleeping over I would assume I was getting laid. Wait, just wait, give it more time.

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What Girls Said 1

  • be careful, if you aren't in a relationship I would not sleep over. he could be preying on you just for sex, maybe he sees your vulnerabilities and thinks you will have sex because you are emotionally weak. sorry to be so negative but it is very possible. I've been with some manipulative a**holes and on the fourth date this guy was asking me all these questions about my virginity and if I was or not and it just made me uncomfortable then he acted all sweet after but I could see the wheels turning in his head

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