I still listen to me and my exes "song", although I'm dating someone else. Is that weird?

My first boyfriend and I were together for 2 1/2 years, and he moved on literally three days after we broke up and proposed to the girl he met three days after we broke up exactly a year after he met her. It was really hard for me but I've actually truly moved on now. However I absolutely love our song, as it's by one of my favorite bands. I'm dating someone else now who I love and who has been my friend for years. Whenever me and my exes song comes on I feel slightly guilty for listening to it, because it makes me think of it. Am I worrying too much? Haha


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Most Helpful Guy

  • You are definitely worrying too much. If it's a good song it would suck if you couldn't listen to it again because of those memories. Music is very closely associated with memory, so it's possible you will always associate this song with your first relationship. But it's something you should feel nostalgic about, not guilty.

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    • That's what I figured haha, I tend to worry a lot though.

    • Thanks for giving me best answer without waiting for something else to compare it to, lol. Possibly confirmation bias, but sometimes we just need some reassurance.

    • Haha I just needed some reassurance haha

What Guys Said 3

  • It's horrible and you're a terrible person for listening to it! Lol on a more serious note, you're definitely over worrying on this. The only reason it's linked to some memories of your ex is because the mind is associative, it connects two or more things together in an effort to help us to learn faster and more efficiently. It works, but then you start to attach meaning to things that are no longer there, such is your case. This is the beauty and paradox of music however; it's packed with meaning yet essentially meaningless. You've moved on, what happened is now in the past. While you may still associate a few memories to the song, there's no meaning to this attachment and it's simply just a song you love, so don't feel guilty as you're not doing anything wrong :)

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  • Not really, maybe you just like the song.

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  • yes that's weird

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What Girls Said 2

  • Yeah, you're worrying too much. It's probably an epic song and you're just listening to it because you like it. There's nothing wrong with that.

    Side note: that's why I don't like to have any "our" things in relationships. When something becomes "our" song or "our" TV show or "our" movie or "our" spot, whatever the thing is gets ruined after the eventual breakup. It's nice to enjoy things together but you can still enjoy them after the relationship is over if you don't put labels on it.

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  • Yeah, you're over thinking that. You like the song, you are happy with your current boyfriend, what's the deal? Enjoy the music :)

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