Need opinions on this situation (online dating, talking, etc...)

So I am back online dating again :P

I was looking around and saw this guys profile. He seemed really nice on his profile. He has a good job, we have similar interests, so I decided to send him a message.

He looked at my profile and said he was interested and mentioned he thought we had a lot in common too. He's older than me, I'm 23 and he is 29.

But I like older guys, and really I am having a hard time finding guys my age that have jobs and aren't just looking for rides everywhere (I have a car).

So, we messaged back and forth, then he gave me his number. I texted him. That's when he asked for a picture. I was hesitant at first, I'm not one to like to send pictures, but I did. It wasn't a sexual picture. I just gave him one of my face, it was a decent pic of me.

He sent me one of his face too. Then he jokingly said "now lower, lower!". Which I said "well I have to leave something to the imagination!"

Then he sent me one of him, no shirt, lying in bed in briefs. I was kind of put off. I mean, he's a good looking guy. But I don't want him to think that I will be sending him nude pics of me. I am not comfortable doing that ever, and we haven't even met yet :S

How do I handle this situation so it doesn't get out of control? I want to meet a guy I can have a relationship with. I'm not sure if this guy has that intention with me?

Thanks in advance for your advice!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Just tell him that maybe he kind of misunderstood you're "well I have to leave something to the imagination.." tell him that you don't want him to think that you're the kind of girl who sends nude pictures and that you won't ever be comfortable doing that. Make it clear to him you're a decent one who wants to take things slow, and you got a little turn off when he did that. In the end turn things positive for him, tell him you're just being honest about what you think and you still want to continue knowing him. Just keep it short but meaningful. Then take a good look to his response, if he understood your means who will take things slow and wants to continue knowing you, too. Then I guess, he can be for keeps. Just understand that sometimes just being honest about what you think can either make a guy respect you and will definitely take time to get to know you because he likes you for you and your honesty, or, can make a guy who will just think you're a waste of time because he's the kind of guy who is only looking for a hook up and is not into getting serious. All of these are only my opinions and at the end of the day it is still up to you to manage everything. Also, keep in mind that online dating needs a lot of work to make things work and is more risky. And, of course make sure to be careful in everything. Wish you all the best.

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What Guys Said 1

  • It seems like he's just looking for a hook up. You need to try looking for more guys.

    There are a lot of genuine guys out there. You just need to filter them out.

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    • Thanks for your answer! This is the impression I am getting from him. Even though on his profile he said long-term. I've definitely got my guard up. Thanks again :)

What Girls Said 2

  • How do you stop it from getting out of control? Just don't let it get out of control. If you don't like what he is doing then stop talking to him. Let him know you aren't comfortable with sending him nude pictures if that's what he wants. Maybe he just wanted to see a full body pic of you, not necessarily nude. But you need to find out what he wants and set your boundaries.

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  • If you proceed, be careful! Best case scenario, he really likes you and feels comfortable enough to flaunt his sexuality, despite it being early on. Worst case, he's a player. So, take it slow and don't give in when he's pushy lol.

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