Is he interested or not?

My friend wanted me to get to know one of her guy friends, so she texted him and told him a little about me he then added me on Facebook and introduced himself to me. We talked on fb for maybe 2 weeks and just go to know each other but he would take a really long time to write back and it would show on fb that he had seen my message just didn't reply. Sometimes it would take a couple hours or more than a day. I then deleted my fb hoping he would wonder what happened. 3 days later my friend was texting with him and he asked her for my phone number and then texted me. We texted back for about another 2 weeks, but again he would take long to respond and we didn't say much. Just like how was your day? Have a good day at work etc. He texted to hang out with me and our mutual friend and her boyfriend (so double date), we agreed on the movies and after I responded with a yes, I would go he never answered me. Well come the day of the "hangout" I heard nothing from him all day, so I finally texted him late afternoon and I just got a hey, how are you? Our mutual friend called him to ask if we were still going out and he said he was sick and contagious, so she told him he should have texted me or called to let me know. Later that night he called me to apologize and said "maybe we could make plans to hang out next week" I answered him with "yes, we could". I was a little annoyed with him so said I had to go. I texted him the next day and apologized for being so short with him on the phone and he said it was fine and apologized again for the night before. he told me to have a nice at work and that was it. The next day came and my friend and I were shopping and she texted him if he was at work and he said he would be in later, it came close to the time he had to be at work and she texted him "hey, are you here, do you want to meet her (me)" and he said I'm already inside clocked in. I texted him the next day and he didn't reply until about 5 hours later...last thing I said was I hope you get the job you interviewed for and he never wrote back..we haven't spoken for 5 days now...but he my friend has texted him and he replies to her...

Please help, I tried to be as detailed as I possibly could. I'm actually interested in him but I don't want to keep texting him if he is not going to reply after a few texts. He's a very nice guy :) I told my friend I would have at least liked to meet him in person..what to do? what to do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • He is not interested. Sounds more like he may be trying to humor your friend who is trying to set you guys up. Did he really ask for your number or did your friend give it to him and tell him to contact you? Does he seem to only text you as a reply to a message you sent him? If he was really interested in you he would make the effort to meet you or at least talk to you more to try to find out more about you. If he works crazy long hours and has 50 other things he needs to do daily. He would still make an effort if he likes what he sees and thinks he has a chance at a roll in the sack, whether he wants long term or not. The fact that he was going to outright stand you up should speak volumes. Some guys would rather string a girl along while trying to slowly pull away hoping she'll clue in and leave him alone rather than telling her he's not interested for fear of upseting a girl and fear of the girl who goes boil your bunny crazy. If he found out you cancelled your Facebook just to see if he would notice, besides the stroke to his ego,he may assume you have low self esteem and are emotionally needy.

    Either stop contacting him no matter how badly you want to just to see if he'll respond. Tell your friend balls in his court. You've put forth enough effort and you don't want to be pursuing someone who is not interested. You don't want to feel like a complete tool in the end when you find out this guy didn't really want to be bothered. OR you can straight up let him know that you want to get to know him better. Say your friend has been harrassing you about meeting him and he seems really nice and would he like to hang out with you this weekend or if he is really busy/isn't interested in dating anyone right now (make sure not to make it a direct question about his interest in you so he doesn't feel he needs to lie to avoid hurting your feelings) that you understand and if he wants a friend your only a text/call away. If he is just unsure, you made your intention clear


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What Guys Said 1

  • The best way to deal with this is to actually meet him in person.

    It must be that he's just contemplating on what to answer or he doesn't really like to respond. Though, it's still clear that he's interested in you.


What Girls Said 1

  • Almost the exact thing happened to me, the guy I liked would barley ever reply on Facebook when he saw it and I would think he didn't like me at all, it turns out he was just a little shy and busy most of the time so that may or may not be the case he could be shy or not know what to say to you maybe ask your friend to question him about it a little bit, just make sure you don't constantly annoy him in anyway

    I hope everything works out good luck!