What is the point of dating?

After my last relationship ended 5 months, I decided that I'm not open to the idea of approaching or dating another woman in my life. I also don't want to make friends either, they will backstab you as well. Overall, I'm completely closed off from dating and from people because I don't trust them or like them. Is this bad? I'm 23 and my decision is final. I'm not gay, It's my decision to be alone for the rest of my life..and I don't get lonely.


Most Helpful Guy

  • The fact that you are able to live without friends or a romantic interest and not feeling lonely is a great thing indeed. It shows that you are very comfortable with yourself.

    You don't want to approach another woman because there is always the risk of rejection. The same goes for friends. They can either fail to accept you for who you are or they can stab you in the back. Whenever you move out to another human being, there is always the risk that the person will move away from you, leaving you more painfully alone than you were before. Trust anyone and you may be hurt. If you are determined to not risk pain, you will have to do without many things: getting married, having children, the ecstasy of sex, friendship - all that make life alive, meaningful and significant. A full life will be full of pain. But the only alternative is not to live fully or not at all.

    You have to realize not every single human being is not trustworthy. There are quite a lot of people who are very much worthy of your trust and you will be rewarded greatly if you do grant them your trust. The fact that a girl left you and your friends stabbed you in the back does not mean that everyone out there is a bad person. Somewhere out there, there is a girl who won't break your heart. Hell, there are probably much more girls who would be great for you, but you just have to find them. I am not saying that you should search for a girl like that, but I am just telling you what is possible.

    My advice for you right now is to live your life like you want to. If you prefer being alone, do that and be happy doing it. Nobody if forcing you to date someone and if someone is forcing you, they shouldn't.

    After a while, you should start to think about what you want in live. Fantasize about where you would like your see yourself in the future. 5 years? 10 years? Where will you be then? Do not think about how you will get there, but really think about what you would like to see. Would you like to be in a great marriage? Kids maybe? Or would you prefer to be alone? What kind of job would you be doing then?

    Thinking about that can serve as setting a goal for yourself. It is very healthy to work towards something. When you do that, other things will follow.

    I hope this helped you. If you have any questions, ask them!


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What Girls Said 2

  • Um stfu here. I have never been anyone's girlfriend for even five seconds because of things like my most recent question. So don't whine that you got five months only I would kill for five minutes. You think you're lonely? Try never being the one they pick over another girl EVER.

    • Wait let me ask, how come you've never been a man's girlfriend? Do you intimidate men?

    • Please go to my profile and look at my last question. I don't intimidate them I've just had the bad luck to like every kind of douche bag in the book including a rapist, an abusive pothead, a drinker, guys that liked me for a long time changing their mind overnight because of some other girl (see my latest question for an example). I believe there is good in too many people and care about ones that don't deserve it.

    • You're dating little boys not men. Raise your standards.

  • I wish you the best. I feel lonely but it is lonely at the top. I would still meet new people because who knows when your male friends start to get married and have kids, you will feel like you miss out. This is happening to me but I figure it will happen when it happens but it won't happen if you don't put some effort (hygiene, exercise, etc)

    • I don't have any friends

    • Show All
    • Easier said than done

    • Of course but if you don't try, then you have a 0% of success, correct? You can take the shot at the basket or you can walk away. If you walk away before even trying then you got 0%

What Guys Said 4

  • Everyone has their own coping mechanism. Maybe this is yours. If at this point, you are not ready to meet people or date anyone then don't. You will probably not get very far even if you tried under this mindset. Enjoy being single and carefree.

    I suggest that whenever you are ready, go meet people with an open mind. You don't even have to go out of your way to meet them, it can be just from work, school or your neighborhood. There is bound to be someone who you will learn to trust and like.

  • You, my friend, are a genius. I don't know why the rest of us idiots get hurt but hop right back in there. But to answer your question that's not bad at all, you made a descision and have the self control to stick to it, and people should respect that.

  • to share your experiences with someone.

    to care for someone and know that someone cares for you

    to have sex with someone you find attractive and know that you are wanted

  • It's really bad.

    If you turn into anti-social, then you should expect that people won't be with you anymore.

    They'll just treat you like some kind of stranger.