Date without drinking?

i'm going on a 2nd date with this guy, he's suggested to go drinks after dinner. I don't drink, what else can we do that'll be fun on a date beside going drinking? Do guys find girls who don't drink boring and conservative?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I rarely drink either, but if I'm going to a bar and people are "uncomfortable" if I'm not drinking with them, I'll either just order a Coke (whose to say it isn't a Rum & Coke?) or a non-alcoholic all-juice cocktail, such as a Batman or a Yellowjacket. They look like a cocktail and so people just assume it is one.

    But I'd just mention that you don't drink, and figure something else out. Go for ice cream or Jamba Juice or something like that, OR, if he just wants to go to a bar, do what I mentioned above: order something non-alcoholic.

    The point of a date is really so that you can spend time with each other and talk, and there are lots better places to do that than a bar. As someone else mentioned, the main reason to go to a bar is to get buzzed so that you essentially have an excuse to made dumb or rash decisions, like, say, going home with him for sex. But you're old enough to do that without needing an excuse if that's what you want to do, and if not, then you don't need your judgement impaired.

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What Guys Said 8

  • I don't drink either, my friends and dates know it, but yeah, IF it felts like I HAVE to drink with them Ill drink a non alcoholic, but don't worry about it so much, I understand one drinking out of pleasure or because they truly like it or feel in the mood, but it has always felt ridiculous to me when you go out and people drink because they feel like it HAS TO BE DONE, you don't have to do anything.

    also totally agree with the idea that a bar is among the lousiests or maybe THE lousiest idea for a date, it is great for a one night stand, but if you are already on the second date I see no point in that.

    the main "problem" you will face is that, unlike going out with friends to drink, this time it will be just the 2 of you, so if he is getting drunk and you don't it will be wierd, las time I went with my girl to a bar it was along with her group of friends with their respective boyfriends, they were getting wasted freshman style, there was one other guy who was not drinking and we spent most of the time chatting with each other and taking care of our girls, but hadn't been for him it whould have been a LONG evening for me, what I try to say, if he drinks too much you will be uncomfortable, but he probably won't even if he wants it SO much because you are not getting wasted with him, it would be like going to an amusement park together but always choosing diferent rides and basically spend the night appart if he drinks freely and you dont, so you better avoid doin just that, leave the drinking date for a time in which you want to meet his friends, so he will have someone to drink with, and for the moment just let him know you don't drink, if he is like "no problem, you drink a soda" then go for it, if he is not going to be uncomfortable, but he may, and thus he will change his idea.

    Im very open and should say DARING in many aspects of my life, but I don't need alcohol to be that way, if anything it takes away from my fun, I like to REALLY live the moment, not being numbed for it, I'm not at all conservative, and hardly think I will be boring, IF you are indeed boring chances are you will be boring with or without alcohol, since drinking won't make you cooler, and not drinking won't make you lame, but you will probably want, if you want to bring another option to the table for date ideas, show how NOT BORING you are, what do you think that makes you interesting and cool? do JUST that for the afterdate.

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  • Drinks are usually used to go beyond some established social or religious limits, saying - it happened while we were out of control. In hangover or semi-hangover many things may go unplanned or he might have made a plan to do something he fears you will not agree to occur. I am from India – and a Dry state. I will say it is Good for you not drinking on date. You can make date full of fun without it too and express yourself in a batter sense, and understood what he means. Buying plain soda or any soft or fruit pulp virgin drink for you and hard drink for him can be tolerated in this condition. If he finds you boring or conservative for not drinking, maybe that guy is not for you. He is not respecting your feelings and likes to use you as a toy.

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    • Thank you! really appreciate such detailed answer. I'll keep this at the back of my mind :)

    • Respect each other is the first condition of friendship or marriage. if it is not observed - it is useless. Thank you for your comment.

  • Just let him know you don't think. I don't drink either. If he's a person who can't have a good time without drinking then you two may not be compatible.

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    • Thank you! I'll keep that in mind

  • I wouldn't think so, as I'm not really much of a drinker myself. You could always go out for coffee or ice cream afterward. What did you do on the first date?

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    • Thanks, we went for lunch, walked around, stopped by a coffee shop ( he doesn't drink coffee)

      sat near the wharf, had dinner afterward.

      for this second date, I suggested it and same with the restaurant for dinner.

      he asked for drinks after and then he remembered I don't drink.

      I just told him we'll go for dinner and decide then. but I can't think of anything ..?

    • This is just me, but I really enjoy laser tag and bowling. Just a thought :-)

    • Thanks BCRanger! I don't mind bowling, something new I guess :)

  • That's OK, just order a coke or something. Maybe he wants to get you drunk. lol. jk Anyways, you can say well... I don't drink but I'll be happy to go with you anyways.

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  • I don't know ... have sex instead...

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  • Do something active - something sporty, outdoorsy

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  • Simply go to physical activities.

    Something like going to pool together, bowling, dancing or singing.

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What Girls Said 6

  • If you don't want to drink you could always get a virgin drink or a soda. I don't think a guy cares if you drink or not unless you start preaching to him about how drinking is amoral or something (not that I think you would hahaha). It depends on what you guys like to do. Maybe you could go dancing, grab some coffee, or go catch a movie. Also if there is anything going on in your local area, you could always go check that out. Good luck!

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    • Thank you! I'm thinking if we do end up going for drinks, I'll maybe get a virgin drink. But we'll see, I much prefer coffee :D

  • Good for you for not drinking.He should find something else to do if you have expressed the fact that you don't desire to drink.If anyone finds you boring or conservative,or make an unecessary big deal about it,maybe that guy isn't for you.

    I don't believe you should have to go to a bar and you don't drink.I think it would be rude for him to take you there,while you're buying virgin drinks and he is getting alcohol.

    There's plenty of things to do besides going to a bar.Take in to consideration where you live,your interests,and his...and choose something else.

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    • Thank you! I know what you mean, I much prefer coffee but too bad he doesn't drink coffee haha

      hopefully we'll be able to find something in between for both of us

  • i can't imagine he'd think less of you because you don't drink, my boyfriend's not even old enough to drink (I will be next month) but for a date, just let him know your not into that scene.. you can do anything haha! movies, go on a walk, get icecream, go dancing etc

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    • Thank you! and hope you have a amazing one for your birthday!

    • thanks! it's right in the middle of finals so I'll probably celebrate it later haha

  • Finally another girl who doesbt drink! I always suggest dates but the guy I dated somehow always had us end up at bars. Try a cute picnic, the zoo, a nature walk. Enjoy this beautiful weather!

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  • Coffee or just don't drink alcohol

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  • get ice cream

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