Is he not interested or playing hard to get. or am I just sending him the wrong message?

I met this guy about a month ago, we went on one really good date, and I saw him a few times casually within the first 2 weeks of properly speaking to him. He was sweet, always asked how I was, would make conversation and was planning loads of things. He pulled away and I figured he was playing hard to get and then we arranged a second date together. He was ill on the date, and it wasn't brilliant but we still kissed and I still wanted to see him again so I text him the next day thanking him for the date. I didn't get a reply till 2 days later, but it was a non-committal text that I couldn't really respond to. I text him a day later joking that he had made me ill because I had seen him, and told him I was tired from work (non-committal) and he responded quite quickly saying "I am so so sorry, I should have left the date early because I was sick lol", but this was when I was sleeping. Today I text him saying "True. It was still nice to see you though," and told him what I was doing today.

He hasn't responded.

Do you guys think he's not interested and trying to sever ties with me, or is he playing hard to get? OR am I just not making it obvious enough and I'm being too blunt/brash in my texts?

Updates:
Thank you for al your responses. He text me back again at 2am saying "Sorry, so busy again today. Home now :)Xxx" (he works all day at a pub and bar till closing at about 1/2am) if anyone has any insights as to why he would text that, would be greatly appreciated. Is he thinking about me and apologising, is this a really bad booty call, or is he stringing me along but not interested?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • He's not interested.

    There's a small chance he is interested but he doesn't realize that he is mixing hissignals, but I'd say unlikely.

    If he was in to it, he would respond well with out much prodding.

    We men are generally very easy to read, and when we're not we are either not interested, or we are confused, or we have some major issues we're dealing with that you probably don't want anything to do with.

    I'd say let him go and if he realizes that you are what he needs, then he will come looking, he will come back.

    If not, realize that you are a wonderful, beautiful person the deserves love and attention and that there are many other people out there who will requite your attentions and have fun with you.

    Try not to dwell on him or to put him on a pedestal.

    There is no reason to optimize his characteristics afterward because (A) nearly anyone is easily optimized if you didn't spend much time with them or get close enough to see the realness of them {we are all flawed, silly humans who bleed and burp and such} and (B) you will likely overlook other excellent people that are right in front of you and mss a chance with another great person because you made too much of someone that isn't even with you.

    Good luck. Stay positive, and remember that you are great and valuable.

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What Guys Said 7

  • Hard to say honestly. Its just women tend to pull away from us if we show interest too much or reciprocate your interest too much. So, we get scaredand go oover board on the hard to get thing and it looks like we re not interested then. Girl pulls away because she thinks that then guy pulls away more or cuts you off thinking your trying to get rid of him. Classic example and happened with me many times. And its sad because you have a guy and a girl breaking apart for no reason at all when they really like each other but in their minds they think each person is rejecting the other. If you like this guy, show you interest, see how he reacts. If he likes you and you pull away, he's going to sense rejection and well he ll pull away more.

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  • I agree with the guys who posted earlier. If a guy is into you, he won't hide it. He might be shy or a little aloof, but if it seems like he's brushing you off, he is.

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  • Maybe the guy just doesn't like to text? or is just too shy, or whatever lame reason. There's a sh*t ton of possible reasons. Just ask him out again and see what his response is and then you won't have to wonder all the time about this silly stuff.

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    • at update: STOP IT! Stop analyzing everything he does...We can't know for sure what he's thinking. All we can do is guess. He texted you, that's a good sign, so just ask him to hang out already!

  • Maybe he thinks he has to go slow or else you will think he is desperate/clingy. You could be more obvious, that never hurts!

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  • You should move on really.

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    • Backburner booty

  • It seems that he's not interested in you.

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  • Well he's playing hrs to get... Several sights in fact I did almost the same things as him.

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