If you enjoy spending time with someone so much, why wouldn't you date them?

If you spend a lot of time being friends and you like each other as friends already, you have a great chemistry and you just "click" with each others' thoughts.. What might be the reason that you wouldn't date that person?

Just curious, because it seems to me that if two people enjoy being with each other that much and even are on the same level on many things, why not date?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Because while two people may have chemistry, they don't necessarily have ROMANTIC chemistry. I found that out with a friend. I loved spending time with him, he made me laugh and he was just a nice guy. So I thought, hey! Why don't we try dating! That would be even better!

    But alas, while I adored him as a friend, I resented him as a lover. He became a completely different person than he was as a friend, and I didn't like that person. I wish we didn't take it there because we may still be really good friends today. But he immediately became so clingy and in my space, and gushy romantic, and it made me grow to hate him :(

    I know it makes sense that if two people enjoy being together they should be partners, but it takes something extra special to be successful lovers, and not every friendship has that. It may work in some cases, but not all.

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What Guys Said 1

  • 1. They are not dating material.

    2. Not looking for a boyfriend/girlfriend.

    3. Secretly like someone else already.

    4. Don't think they are good enough to be that person's boyfriend/girlfriend.

    5. Not sure how the other person will react to the idea of dating... being afraid of rejection.

    6. External reasons (Family, friends, environment, etc).

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What Girls Said 7

  • Because there's so many things that could jeopardize the relationship and if you guys break up, it would mean losing your best friend too. I tried this with one of my best friends and he ended up kinda screwing me over. It hurt me so much more just because I didn't expect my best friend to hurt me, but it happens regardless if you were friends. Well we are friends again, but I feel like that's not something that happens. We didn't talk for about 2 months and it sucked. Just be careful and be sure that you guys both feel the same way entirely. Romantic relationships are so much different than friendships!

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  • I personally date to marry, so I'm looking for a lot more than chemistry in a partner.

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  • I have a best friend that I talk to everyday, however, I have no physical attraction to him. I have several guy friends like this but no matter what, I just don't have a physical attraction. I would consider it, but I feel as though I would hurt them in the end :/

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  • Enjoy spending time with isn't the same as what I'd define as chemistry. Different morals/values changes things as well.

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  • they probably don't wanna ruin the friendship

    scared to tell the other person how they feel because of rejection

    not sexually attracted to each other

    they're friends alraedy has a boyfriend or girlfriend

    there's a lot of reason friends never start dating.

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  • No sexual chemistry and clashing values.

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  • They're still not perfect.

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