Guys, would you rather date an independent, or a submissive girl?

Interdependent girl -> Has job, wants to succeed/earn her own money almost just as much as she wants a family, thinks relationships should be based on equality and compromise, expects you to take on domestic responsibilities. Usually wants less children.

Submissive girl -> Has a part time, or no job, wants to make her family her priority, thinks leadership and decision making should be up to her boyfriend/husband, places herself in a position of the adviser, expects you to earn majority of the money and not handle domestic responsibilities. Usually wants more children.

I've seen many from both types of these women and this would be the general profiles.

Try not to presume independent girls are bitches, or submissive ones are idiots, or anything of that sort. Simply consider the text I wrote.

  • Independent girls.
    10% (1)53% (8)36% (9)Vote
  • Submissive girls.
    10% (1)47% (7)32% (8)Vote
  • I'm a girl.
    80% (8)0% (0)32% (8)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy

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Most Helpful Guy

  • i don't know it would depend on her personality and if I found her attractive or not

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What Guys Said 7

  • Everlasting relation is not associated with Submissive or Interdependent. Both the partners should respect each other`s feelings and support to do his / her best. In Indian culture girl is preferred submissive, but my is free to express her like and dislike for everything in family matters and with me, observing all her responsibilities and managing priorities. I have voted Interdependent - as she is for most of the things, and I love it.

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    • I only meant for you to consider what I wrote. Not presume a submissive girl is not allowed to speak her mind. That is not part of the description nor is it a necessary correlation.

  • Umm.. not really either tbh. I love the idea of a girl who will be loving and loyal and care about me as I'd care about her. A truly independent girl I've found tends to not be that... doesn't really feel the need to be around their mate and ya.. but a submissive girl is no good either because it's nice that a girl can take care of herself or has her own passions and interests or would be willing to speak her mind/opinion against mine cause I'd love to make sure she's happy and wanting to do things she wants to do instead of what a typical submissive girl would do which is always just do what the other would do.

    I hope that all made sense.

    Basically, a truly independent girl is no good because they generally don't put enough effort into a relationship as they focus fully on themselves and what they want and such and a truly submissive girl is no good because she doesn't focus enough on her own interests or share her opinion if it's different because she might worry about upsetting the guy. Both extremes suck.

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    • Your presumptions are quite wrong.

      You see, you acknowledge that independent women TEND to be self centered, then you say submissive ones ARE the way you describe them.

      While many more independent women are often torn in their struggle to make everyone happy and are loving and dedicated, and almost no submissive woman is silent and without individuality.

      I clearly asked to only consider the things I wrote in my question.

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    • Or I misunderstood what you meant :P I thought you were saying that in a marriage both have to hide their wishes/urges.

      But to be back on topic, I have met women so submissive they hide their thoughts and opinions and urges and wishes from their partners and that makes me go "bah" :\ Still don't really like either extreme :P

    • I did not ask you about application. Extreme is a consequence of conditions set in my question. I asked, which conditions of life do you hope your woman will decide to take, not how her personality will manifest towards you depending on those conditions. Frankly, that second topic would be so broad it's ridiculous to try to discuss it in the comments.

  • I want a girl who works full-time while I work full-time and we would both split the house work 50/50.

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    • Vote independent in the poll, if it's not too much trouble.

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    • not saying a "submissive" girl is any less capable. and I'm not insulting a couple who live a traditional lifestyle. I'm just saying what I prefer. sorry if there was any confusion

    • Ok I did not think you were insulting, really. I just have no idea what you mean. I actually did not understand. xD

      Maybe you miss-expressed yourself? I hoped you'd clarify what attracts you to girls who are more independent, is all.

  • Something in-between.

    Mostly submissive, yet I'd prefer her to speak her mind instead of automatically agreeing to everything, even if deep inside she doesn't feel like it!

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    • That's not what a submissive girl is.

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    • When I say mind of her own, I mean she has good ideas. She is the adviser. I did not say, she will dump you if you do not let her be a bitch.

      And to be honest I have no idea what you are trying to say at all. People who don't argue are a match..? Huh? /=I

    • I didn't fully get what do you mean either, but whatever

  • I like co-dependent relationships so A is not my thing. Voted B because it's the closest in the poll.

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    • How does a co-dependent relationship look like?

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    • Independent can be defined in many different ways. It's normal that you may disagree. I did not ask you to agree. I asked you to observe my definitions and answer accordingly. If I called it apple, and you agree with it's definition, then you pick apple. xD

    • What I would have voted for is still not your definition, though, as it has like half of what I consider independent and half of what I don't:p So I voted correctly anyway

  • I prefer submissive girls as I don't like girls giving me orders. Also not too keen on girls who think too highly of themselves without known what their place is.

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    • Do you think girls who are independent (by the definition in my question) think they are worth more than you? Or that they are worth as much as you?

      Or did I misunderstand "thinking too highly of oneself"?

    • They usually think they are of higher worth, this is especially the case when they don't earn all that much money and think they contribute far more than monies worth.

    • What kind of contributions do they make, that you say they use to overestimate themselves?

  • Hands down, it would be the independent girl since it would be much more satisfying talking and spending time with her.

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    • How did you conclude that?

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