I am intimidated by his intelligence, will he get bored?

I started dating this amazing guy. Ea. date I learn more about him and I realized how smart and knowledge he is. He is doing very well with himself.

I on the other hand is also a very confident woman. I have no problem having various conversations with my friends and guys I am not all that into.

I am usually bubbly, chatty, giggly and flirty when out with others. these guys find me attractive and falls for me.

With him, I feel very uncomfortable, nervous and still feel very shy, embarrassed in front of him especially when the conversation surrounds topics that are highly intellectual or sexual...i turn all red and can't come up with anything to say.

there are things I can talk about, but I am just not as easy going in front of him.

i fear that this would hurt the development of the relationship and that he might find me boring after awhile. I have told him that I am nervous even after knowing him for a month...but he seem to love teasing me and making me blush...but I don't like that I am not comfortable acting myself..i want to.. I want to be that confident, happy, bubbly lady that I am in front of him...

any suggestions?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The thing with those types of guys, myself included, is that we treasure intellectuallity, if someone knows more about a subject than we do then we will listen very attentively to that person until we have learned about the subject. We know deeply that other people might know more than us on many subjects, but we are always open to listening, unless you stumbled on the know-it-all version which is all about talking. As you might have noticed we often times find people boring, but if the person is respectful and talks about things they enjoy doing or picture their vision of the world. They can be as interesting as people who are very intellectual.

    Personally, I don't like talking to people who are loud and mock others as a joke just to make themselves feel important. I'm humble enough to admit I make mistakes, but one thing I'm not is arrogant to others. For your bubbly personality, it will pop-out once you feel more comfortable about the guy. I've dated a girl like that at first she would turn tomato red and mumble half her words in a sentence, then as she got more comfortable, after the 4th date I think, she talked so much I had a hard time keeping up with the verbal roaller coaster ride. I had to repeat 3/4 of the stuff she said just to confirm I understood what she meant.

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What Guys Said 3

  • At some point, he's going to stop bringing up intellectual topics around you. Depending on his temperament, he will either be fine with not sharing these things with you, or frustrated. You can't just be smarter over night, so just try to win him over with your bubbly spirit and don't forget to listen to him when he brings up any deep subjects because then he'll know at least you care.

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  • Try closing your eyes when you are around him. This will allow you to gather your bearings, before you speak to him. Always, ALWAYS address him as Sir, and bring him numerous amounts of sandwiches. Any kinds that you can think of. Preferably, spam, sardines, onions, and mayonnaise. These sandwiches should make him self conscious because he will be concerned about his horrendous smelling breath, giving you the advantage. (Granted you're chewing on a breath mint) Make sure that you tell him that you are the only girl that will EVER accept him for his sh*tty smelling breath, and that no girl could ever love a guy with that bad of breath. This will make sure that he never leaves you. For him talking about sexual things with you, to make you blush. Simply ignore him and talk about your collection of dildos. This will make him feel as he must compete with them. It's good for men to have a little competition in their lives.

    PS: Make sure that you always open your mouth when you're going to speak, or otherwise, it's just humming. Men hate humming.

    You're welcome.

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  • It doesn't matter if he's intelligent or not. Most guys just want a woman who will listen to them and appreciate them for their level of success. You will not definitely bore him.

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    • but I wish I can be more myself...the confident, teasing, chatty self...now I am so shy and nervous around him. I fear, eventually he thinks I am not all that fun :(

      he takes control of the outing and conversation which I am fine, but I want that intellectual input from me as well..i just can't do it when he is teasing me and making me blush all the time ...

What Girls Said 1

  • Oh boy..lmao, sheeh well first let me say lol. I'm thankful I'm not the only nut out here.lol. Kidding. Oh gosh I wish I can help. See the thing is I'm in the same exact boat ..omg girl. Smh I want to tell you be around him more.. I don't know how Ur gonna do that, but I'm thinking that's the only way to become easy around someone... I personally try to avoid him sometimes altogether..lmao. But..yeah that's not going to work but test out my first suggestion. Be around him more for about 2 or 4 weeks. See what happens.. Than come back and tell me. If it working . Lol. Cause honey at times I'm a nervous wreck around him.But that's only because I don't know how he feels about me. ..see he rejected me time and time before then out the blue told me he did care about me..alot. Months after he rejected me. But sense then we never brought anything up again. I wanna ask but, I lost the courage in fear he will reject me. Smh idk... Good luck and please keep,me up to,date

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    • are you two dating? how often do you see him? what are somethings he says to you?

      i would like to see him more often, but can't due to his job. we see ea. other like once a week. when together he likes me a lot and flirts with me a lot. I know he likes me.

      I just can't seem to be 100% myself when with him... I fear he will get bore of me since I am not all myself and I don't know if I should tell me more about my uneasiness

    • Show All
    • Ok, I guess you can friends request me by clicking my pic. Takes you to my page ..and you select. friends request. Well he,was doing some work inside my kids school, as I was picking them up he took my name an number he wanted to offer some products from his company he into sales.

      This didn't happened over night, we converse back and forth for a while, then I took a position part time in his company. Then we were in contact frequently. And I've notice I became a little flirty. Like just...

    • thank you, I friended you. :)

      so you two already have a bit of history together. can't wait to hear more :)

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