Ok OK .. Everyone gets heartbroken and sets up walls but is he taking it to the extreme?

Instructor liked me and I liked him. My friend knows him and she sort of helped me break the ice so him and I can conversation after I graduated. Texted here and there but never hung out. Stopped talking after 3 months and we saw each other 2 weeks ago due to our friends getting together for a drink or two.

He seemed excited to see me as so was I. Man with the bar owner walks in and stars buying me and my friend drinks. My guy looked like it was bothering him because he kept looking at me and smiling while shaking his head. He texted me while everyone was there telling me it must be nice to have boobies and get free stuff. I kept the conversation going but it ended badly. Ended up not saying bye to him. Texted him and apologized for my actions and told him he acts like a douche to me most of the time but he says he has walls and he waits until people prove to him that they are good people so he can know where they stand in his life. I've reassured him and even admitting to the fact that I liked him. We texted after that for a few days then the whole feeling died. We were going to set up a date to hang out but he just didn't set one and it pissed me off. He gave me the upper hand so I can pick a day but I want him to pick it -_- anyways ... The further I try and get close to him the more he pushes me away.. Which leads me to going no where. Sometimes I feel like just hitting him up and asking him to come and have a few drinks with me but I stop and convince myself not to.

He's not a douche and I know it because he is sensitive. But he over does it sometimes with the whole wall theory .. What can I do? If I text him to hang out I don't know if he'll reject me. I will see him soon one day because we have mutual friends BUT, he doesn't talk to me when we all hang out.. He texts me ... Like.. Lol suggestions please?


Most Helpful Guy

  • If you like him, then you should always act like it. And ending an evening badly and then apologizing isn't the right way to do it. You should end the evening like a lady.

    As for picking the day, put your big girl panties on and pick a day. He's seeing if you really do like him or if you are just bullsh*tting. If you want to hang out with him, do it. Pick up the phone and invite him over for drinks.

    • Ok OK fine. You win :(

    • Show All
    • Yeahhhh lol apparently he has a girlfriend now :( but thank you so much

    • There are plenty of guys out there...no worries. As long as you learned something from the experience.


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What Guys Said 3

  • He's using it as an excuse. It's his failed attempts beyond his walls that make him that way not what he does while hidden behind it.

    • It's just frustrating. -_- good point. Never saw it that way.

  • I do the same things...

    That's our way of weeding out the undesirables...

  • It's quite clear that he has deep insecurities. You should just seek another guy. It will never work with him again.


What Girls Said 1

  • Some guys use that as an excuse to manipulate. There is a possibility that he really does have walls up but IMO it's not really your job to figure it out. If you're this unsure about him in the beginning then he's just not datable and maybe you shouldn't try with him