So I have a problem...

So I was dating this guy for about a year and a half, but I broke up with him like 5 weeks ago. He was one of my best friends before we started dating and we decided to stay friends. But it turns out that he is a little bitter because I broke up with him a feel before his birthday (which was the last thing on my mind at the time). I apologized and everything about that... Anyway long story short, I started hanging out with another guy recently and he just asked me out and I said yes... How do I go about this without hurting my ex? Thanks so much!


0|0
1|5

Most Helpful Guy

  • Tha'ts the problem with trying to stay friends. He'll probably be really hurt that you have a new guy after only a month...

    There's no way to soften the blow for him. I'd drop all contact with him, just to avoid having to hear about his hurt feelings. If the birthday upset him so much, imagine what having a new boyfriend will do.

    See if he contacts you after a while. it's posible that, after some time has passed, he will be able to be a friend again without being jealous of other guys. But not now...crop all contact for now.

    0|0
    0|0
    • I can't really do that since we are in the same circle of friends...

    • Well, no, not completely. But drop the level of intimacy then.

      You can be distant with him..chat about something other than your past time together, bring other people into the converation, avoid talkinga bout your new guy, unless the new guy comes to be with you and your friends..that will be sticky of course. Talk to him as you would a casual friend, and don't let him take you away from yur friends to have a one on one conversation. It can't do any good right now.

What Guys Said 4

  • No one wants to imagine another guy giving it to a girl he has feelings for. So you might as well just stop talking to him for a long time. You simply cannot be friends with someone you just broke up with. Think about him for once and don't keep hurting the guy.

    0|0
    0|0
  • No way around the fact that your ex is going to feel hurt. the truth is no man wants to be just friends with a woman he's known as friends for a while, then started dating, then who dumped him (especially around his Bday). and he's going to be jealous and emo about you being with someone else when he'd still want to be with you. sorry, that's the whole that was dug.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Break up will have a feeling is not good, so no way to this thing. Sex and love are inseparable. Break up must be a kind of pain. A man is better than two pain together

    0|0
    0|0
  • You just forget your ex.

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 1

  • There's honestly not a way to go about moving on without hurting the person who didn't want to be moved on from. The best way to inflict the least amount of pain is to allow him to dictate the terms of your "friendship".

    Let him know that because you care about him, you want him to be able to get the closure that he needs, so you're going to allow him to take control of how much communication you have and whether or not you try to hang out. That means that you let him text you first (or not at all) and you let him decide what you're going to talk about. I know it's hard to lose your best friend, but that was one of the inherent risks of dating. Especially while you're both just starting to think about dating other people he might need way more space that you do (as you were already okay with the break up because you did the ending instead of the other way around). I know it sounds so much better to stay friends with him and know that you can call him or text him when you need him, but that was something you chose to give up when you broke up with him, and you need to give him the chance to get over you. :)

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...