Double standards maybe?

this is for girls but guys can answer how you feel too :) latley I've been starting to date again and I've noticed something kind of frustrating and I was wondering if it was just me. it seems like guys ask waaaay to much for girls to consider dating them when some guys don't meet up to half of their own standards! like some guys want a girl who is pretty, in shape, dresses nice, smart, takes care of herself, funny, has great personality all wrapped up in a nice little bow. but it is almost impossible to find a guy with at least a fourth of those qualities. is it just one of those double standards in society? or is it our fault as women for settling for less than what we deserve?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Women should stop settling.

    We have a lot power but many of us fail to use it

    Lots of guys will do almost anything for a beautiful woman, but so many pretty girls act like they have to do backflips to gain approval.it's backwards and sad.

    confidence and charm will get you far. Girls who go after the best guys are often judged as shallow or gold diggers but those terms are given by those who want to control us and keep us around for their own benefit so stop caring what other people think and get yours.

    Don't wanna date a certain type of guy? Don't date him.guys will change when they realize the girls they want like a certain type of man.why do you think so many guys are trying to be jerks, because they see or think it works to get hot girls.why do some guys try so hard to be flashy and show off their money, so they can attract hot girls

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    • "Lots of guys will do almost anything for a beautiful woman." Which gives women your power to sit back and judge...

      " but so many pretty girls act like they have to do backflips to gain approval.it's backwards and sad."

      If by that you mean wait for someone to come,sure

      You have a lot of "power" because men give it to you remember that. If you didn't have men taking the initiative to approach, ask out, pay for first dates you women would be a lot worse of when it comes to "settling."

What Guys Said 9

  • "impossible to find a guy with at least a fourth of those qualities. "

    Attraction doesn't work equally on both ways. What you find attractive in a guy, we guys don't find attractive in a girl. "Pretty, in shape, dresses nice, smart, takes care of herself, funny, has great personality" is what is known as FEMININITY. Men are attracted to feminine women. Being feminine is apparently a long lost art, you can ask your grandmother for tips about it.

    "less than what we deserve?"

    Learn this, little girl, nobody deserves nothing. We're not born in this Earth deserving the best. If we were that'd be a recognised universal human right; it isn't. You deserve what you EARN, what you've worked so hard for. The condition of "deserving the best" just because you're born a woman is called "Entitlement mentality". It is responsible for the rising level of unhappiness among women, especially in the Western World, and you should put a lot of care into not falling for the same.

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    • Agreed. Entitlement is one of the most repulsive sh*tty attitudes you can come into dating with.

  • I think this is just true in general. This may seem a bit unrelated, but if you look at online dating the response rates are ridiculously low. People really do have high expectations for who they date. Nobody envisions themselves ending up with someone who has flaws so getting past those flaws can be tough. I don't think it's a double standard

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  • Under 18? Girl you've got a lot to learn from the big boys and big girls.

    If you approach the dating world with a list of expectations, then expect yourself to be disappointed. NOBODY can EVER meet your expectations, if it does happen? then write a book about it, a romantic story or a romantic novel.

    And you are pretty much wrong about a guy's expectation on girls. You know what "MEN" really want in women? You can find these 3 things in almost every article, book, or blog written by men on what they want in women.

    1. The ability to cook

    2. Cleanliness ("Cleanliness is next to Godliness"- ancient proverb)

    3. A lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets

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  • Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell

    That's universal actually. You'll find LOADS of girls with the same list of sh*t they'd like.

    In the end though, most guys and most girls are pretty happy settling for someone they're happy with.

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  • Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man.

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  • That's why I don't ask girls out. If I was a female I would never date myself, so what's the point of asking?

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  • I've noticed hypocrisy is blatant in most people whether it be men or women.

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  • I would have to say that women are the ones with higher standards. Men don't have the risk of pregnancy, and all of the problems that comes with that. So women are designed to be a lot more selective of their partners.

    One study asked men to come up with a list of deal breakers that would prevent them from going out with a woman. The men came up with about 10. When women were asked to come up with a list of deal breakers, the women came up with over 150. Any way you look at it, women are far more picky than men.

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  • People have a tendency to feel like they're getting the short end of the stick.

    Here are some things from a male perspective. When it comes to beauty, girls wear make-up, which can make a huge difference: comparing someone who does wear make-up with someone who doesn't isn't useful really. Also many guys know very little about make-up and think a girl is a natural beauty when actually she's wearing make-up: that doesn't suggest high standards to me. As for being in shape, do fat guys really go for slim girls? I can't remember the last time I saw that. The problem is, many people consider the ideal male figure to be muscular: that means going to gym. There is very small pool of ripped guys out there, because of the effort it takes.

    I don't know where you got the idea that guys are looking for funny girls. Guys look for girls who can take jokes not make jokes.

    The dressing nice part can be easily fixed. So I don't know why you see that as a big issue. Would you really want a guy who's obsessed with fashion?

    But, even if you're right, consider this. The guy makes the approach in almost all cases. Some guys think in terms of leagues and actually talk themselves out of approaching the girls they like. Perhaps you haven't noticed those guys. But, some guys take the view, which I do, that, if you're going to risk rejection, you might as well go for the girl you want.

    I think guys would actually have lower standards than girls if girls started approaching.

    And, of course, there's the money issue, where let's face it, guys have much lower standards than girls.

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