How to cancel a last minute date?

I invited a girl to see movies just me and her.

Few hours before meeting up she texted me that she was gonna bring her guy friends. In noooo wayyy I would wanna meet them.

Updates:
I canceled it one hr in advance. I said I was called in to work cause my manager was bearing a baby and I couldn't say no. Her reply was "thanks for letting me know guardian of pregnant women"

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Most Helpful Girl

  • People are saying she brought guy friends because she doesn't like you in the way you're hoping but she could've easily misunderstood and thought it was just a friendly meet up, not a proper date. If you're clear to her it's a date, then she'd know bringing friends would be inappropriate. I think it's a bit of miscommunication on your part. Next time, ask he on a "date" and if she wants to bring guy friends, don't cancel, but tell her outright that you want it to be you and her. If she cancels or seems uncomfortable when you say that, then that'd be a clear indication that she's not interested.

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    • I've been asked out to the cinema with a guy and thought it'd be cool to invite more. I always say, "the more the merrier". I like a large crowd of friends rather than just two people. That girl could've just been like me. Girls like me need a reality check when it comes to guys wanting dates alone. They need to tell us that otherwise, we'll believe it's just a friendly meeting.

    • I've gone to many dates and none of my dates have ever invited their guy friends. Sometime they ask me if their girlfriends can tag along and I always say "yes". Then I invite one of my buddies and I make it a "double date". However, no way in hel1 I would want to invite 3 girls I know so they would take care of these dudes.

What Girls Said 6

  • How did you deal with it then? Being honest would be fine though, if you invited a girl and she just invited other people without checking with you, I wouldn't like it either. Did she know it was a date?

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    • In my opinion its a common sense. Any girl would know when a guy was flirting with her on the phone for a period of time before asking her out.

    • Well, I didn't know you were flirting with her. I had a friend asking me to the movies, someone I barely talk to or barely hang out with, could've been a situation like that. But good thing you cancelled.

  • Maybe just say "I was hoping it would be just us."

    Or did you ask her out in one of those vague ways where she didn't realize it's a date? THat happens to me quite often...

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    • Yes, I agree. She might not realize that this is a date.

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    • None of these points suit you? Well, you had better make sure that you're very clear and precise in your speech, so that people don't take you the wrong way. Why can't a guy invite a girl to see a movie in a friendly manner? So perhaps she didn't know it was a date.

    • Obviously it wasn't that clear. Who brings another guy to a date?!

  • if you are serious about her, then go meet them, its not like they are actually going to beat you up for dating her

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    • I already made hangout plans with a different girl. Its a common sense that I'M NOT interested to see her dude friends.

    • Umm, that's a little strange, going on a date with many other guys...

  • I would cancel. That girl is not interested in you. If she was, she wouldn't invite friends along, even more so that they are guys. Get out now and count yourself as lucky ;)

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    • Well, some girls like being the center of attention, but I agree. She is only interested in herself it seems.

    • I canceled it. I think so too. She likes to play guys.

    • There is not enough evidence to conclude that she likes to be the center of attention or is interested in herself. It could just be a misunderstanding. Also, wanting to be the center of attention is not related to gender. It has to do with arrogance. Arrogant or prideful people like to have attention. Insecure people also like attention.

  • If you're going to cancel just straight up tell her why, that wasn't very cool her.

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    • What wasn't cool? Me canceling it or her inviting her friends?

  • Wait... she invited her friends to go with her on a date? Without consulting you first?

    If I have that right, I'd just tell her exactly that, that you wanted to go with her only.

    If I don't have that wrong, let me know...

    Haha!

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What Guys Said 6

  • There's nothing wrong with cancelling a date, however, there's ways to go about it. This is a rather easy fix.

    You asked a girl out and she responds by agreeing. You have just confirmed a date. You already know all the people involved, just her and you.

    Later on she decides to change the demographics by adding some guy friends. At that point, you should have tried to find out why directly from her and asked her if there was a possibility that she could hang out with them some other time.

    If her reasons were not to your satisfaction, and she refused to tell them not to come, then you could have cancelled and either told her you would reschedule at a time when you two would go alone, or just tell her that it would be in your best interest to seek other people since her attachment to her guy friends may conflict with you two spending time alone together.

    That way everyone knows what the other is thinking. It may have prompted a change of heart for her to reconsider cancelling her guy friends, or maybe not, but either way, the air is cleared and you both would get a better picture of where you stand with one another.

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    • I completely agree. Very good advice. You could start your own columns like this.

      link

      Communicating solves problems, and let's you know what the other person's intentions are.

  • Woah, She decided to bring her guy friends along with her at the last minute?! Bro, Good Idea on cancelling and don't contact her back till she does.

    I would say probably just say "I'm not feeling well" Or "Sorry, something came up and I have to go help my mother who isn't feeling well".

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  • You don't cancel a date at the last minute. It is not right, and it makes you look bad and unable to commit. If you have a problem with the girl bringing her guy friends along, then voice your objections.

    Tell her: "I invited you because this was a date. I don't feel comfortable with you bringing your guy friends along. I'm not being selfish, it just makes me uncomfortable and doesn't sit well with me. Also, because this is just supposed to be us, I do not want to meet your guy friends." Is she aware this is a date, or does she think this is a social outing? If she thinks this isn't a date, then you have to make that clear. If she thinks this isn't a date, then she will not see any problem with bringing friends along.

    Just because there is a problem, is not reason to cancel this. Just follow through, if you have what it takes. Cancelling is cowardly. It' like you can't deal with problems by running, if you just cancel, especially if you don't give a reason.

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    • That is such crap. Imagine if the roles were reversed and a guy wanted to bring a bunch of his female friends to a date... it just wouldn't happen - the girl would NOT go through with it (nor should she), so don't tell the guy do the same...

      It was completely thoughtless of her to not think of the guy's asking her to the movies as a one on one occasion. People (men or women) should not be expected to put up with crap like this.

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    • Time is not money for me. I wouldn't worry about costs, especially if it was for someone I cared about. You basically lied. How are you going to deal with it if the girl asks you if you can tell her about what happened. Does she think you know how to take babies out of women? If so, does that mean that she will expect you to be able to do that if there was an emergency? How are you going to deal with the problem if this happens again? Are you going to keep on telling her untruths?

    • What is going to happen if you go on another date, and she wants to bring friends along? You're going to try to run away instead of actually communicating with her and solving the issue once and for all?

  • You should have told her that it's a date because when girls prepare for dates, they prepare properly.

    What am I saying? I'm not a girl.

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  • What a ****!

    I say don't even bother to cancel - her thoughtless action of inviting other penises to the date shows her absent-mindedness, so she doesn't deserve a cancellation notice.

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  • Send her a text telling her that something came up and you can't make it. Then toss her phone number in the trash and move on.

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