My parents won't allow me to date him, help?

I'm 18, I felt in love with one boy we go to school together. I'm Muslim, this boy isn't and my parents will never agree for it. I can't even tell them because they may force me to change school. Actually I can meet with this boy only at school because my parents are very controlling, I can't go out like other girls and if I do I must inform parents exactly where I'm.

This boy is tired of this situation and I am afraid that he will break up with me anyway .

Help! because I will kill myself !


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Don't change schools. If they tell you to change schools, just don't. If they don't like your boyfriend, tough. That's YOUR choice, not theirs. Be your own person. Don't let your pushy, fucking asshole bastard parents tell you who to love, and try to run your life. Run your own life. If they can't handle that, then do what you need to do, if you really think this guy is worth it. If they care about you at all, they'll come around eventually.

    So do whatever you need to do, but stand up to them, and show some guts. Be an adult. You're a grown-ass woman! If you need to move out, do it. If that means staying with your boyfriend, or a friend, do it. If that means getting a job to pay for school (assuming your parents are the ones currently paying for your schooling) then you get a job and pay for it. If this guy is so important to you, then you do what you need to do, and you stand your ground, even if that means changing things to make sure it gets done. If he's not worth standing up to your folks, moving, or getting a job, just so you can support yourself and stay with him, then he's absolutely not worth killing yourself.

    Finally, I need to tell you something. If you are seriously going to kill yourself over a guy, that's fucking stupid. I mean seriously fucking stupid. Secondly, if you're going to kill yourself rather than fight for this guy and do everything possible to keep him, and just let your parents control you until you kill yourself... then that's EXTRA fucking stupid. Use your head, girl.

    So... My advice. Do everything you need to do, or he's not worth it.

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    • Thank you. I'm thinking of killing myself because I can't make my own decisions , I don't party like other girls, don't go on dates, and I will lose that guy eventually. It isn't so easy to leave family , they will find me everywhere, you don't understand this problem, they will never allow me to marry non-Muslim or to have a boyfriend, sometimes I think that the only escape is dead.

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    • Then pack your bags, and stay with a friend, or with your boyfriend. Move out in teams. Get friends together, so that when you go back, you have witnesses, support, and backup if they try to stop you. Change your bank accounts to something they can't control. Make your bank account paperless so they can't monitor it. When you've moved out, get a job. If possible get your boss on your side.

    • More than that, if they "find you" don't buckle when they come to you. If they say "you're coming home right now" you refuse. If they try to take you by force, be sure to tell those nearby to call the cops.

What Guys Said 3

  • they are right

    because you can't marry a non-Muslim

    if you're with him you will fall in love and will want him to commit eventually

    but you two don't have a future together and he won't commit and at that stage when you two won't work out, you will be devastated and heart-broken

    so your parents are doing this to protect you

    believe me yourll want to kill yoursef even more then

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    • but I don't even like being Muslim, I'm Muslim only because my family forces me ,and it's killing me, I am really thinking of suicide :( I want to make decisions by my own

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    • so I should be unhappy just to make othe rpeople happy? why can't I think about myself?

    • well itll be selfish. and the id rather make myself (one person) unhappy than make my parents and family (more than two people) unhappy

      in simple quantity your parents' happiness wins

      but I don't know about quality of happiness

      let me just tell you, you can find love with anyone, Muslim or not

      its not something to worry about so much

      and you're still a kid right now, maybe you grow up and see things different, that this is how the world is and you just have to deal with it

  • It seems that your parents are quite protective of you. You should follow their advise until you can live on your own.

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  • That's because there's a conflict of belief.

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