Why isn't my girlfriend as affectionate?

Well to start of me and Callie have been best friends since we were babies practically. And we grew up around each other a lot, I dated Annalyse, the third member of our three way group of best friends. And we eventually broke up then I dated some other girls throughout the years and Callie had still been my best friend. And eventually I had realized that Callie was the one I truly thought was the best comparable with. So we started going on dates and it was going great. And eventually got together. The thing is, that if we hug or kiss, or hold hands or anything I'm the one to start it. I feel that she lives me, she's told me she has. But it's hard to tell sometimes. She says she just not an affectionate person but it's hard to believe. She's an our doors, fit, healthy, sporty girl. A day hiking would be relaxing to her. And I love it too. But some day I'd like to just sit on the couch watching movies all day snuggled up under covers and her kissing me on the cheek randomly or whispering in my ear she loves me so much then squeezing me as hard as she can. I like a sporty girl, but I want her to be soft too. I want her to be gentle sometimes and nurturing(if that's the way to say it) I'm a man, 18. I'm not a wimp who still needs his mothers comfort but I would love it if she did kiss me randomly or hug me right for no reason or hold my hand because she wants to not just me. Is that too much to ask for? Am I just a wimp? Is it bad to want a cute relationship were she does all that?

Please add suggestions on what to do!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Some girls just prove not be the affectionate type. Its not because she doesn"t want to show you her affection its just sometimes its hard to know how to with out feeling stupid or vulnerable. Especiallly if she's the type of girl who is not normally like that.

    At some point while you were friends she may have shown to be a little more soft or gentl but now that you're in a relationship its hard for to know exactly how to be that way with you. It for doesn't mean she doesn't care you just have to be a little patient nd try to help her be a little more comfortable with those things. And I'm sure if you let her know you like it when she's genntle or sweet she'll try and do it more often.

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What Girls Said 1

  • Omigosh <3

    It is amazing to hear that guys feel the same way about that stuff. I don't think that is wrong at all, I think it's super cute. Have you done those things to her? Because maybe if you start doing it more she'll follow your lead and do it back.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Some girls just arent' like that. If that will be a problem for you, long term..you may want to reconsider this relationship.

    Is it possible you're too available for her? She's taking you for granted? Maybe put a little spice into the relationship.

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    • I don't think that's it, because wee both busy. With jobs and other things. We usually see each other two to three times a week.

    • I meant emotionally available. Has she always been like this?

    • She's proved she lives me. I pretty much know that she does. Her not being as affectionate just worries me. But no, she has had I guess a spell on her or a couple really good days when she did do some the more affectionate stuff

  • It seems that she's just not that the affectionate type.

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  • You can't change someone.

    If that sort of thing is important to you, then she's not the one for you.

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