I have no clue what to do anymore, PLEASE HELP ME :(

I've been with my boyfriend for close to a year and a half and I'm on the verge of leaving him. When we first started dating he knew I didn't do any drugs. The problem was I thought he felt the same way. Five months into our relationship we get into an argument about smoking pot, and he said that he's always smoked and I was basically trying to change him. Which is a lie, because he knew if I would've seen him smoking pot earlier on in the relationship I would've ended it. Basically he said either you let me smoke or we can't be together, so I made a deal with him; he can smoke but can't do it around me whatsoever, few months later what does he do but start selling the sh*t and almost got busted. The funny part is, is that I told him when we first started going on dates that I've dated guys that were potheads and I brokeup with them, and when we made that agreement he promised it would be once and a while, but now its everyday. Basically I'm at my breaking point he now wants me and him to get a place together with his three best friends and they're all stoners. He refuses to get a real job because they'll drug test him so he's stuck at domino's being a pizza boy. I had hope when he mentioned joining the military but no surprise here he doesn't follow through with it because he knows he'll fail the drug test but still doesn't stop smoking. I have no idea what to do, how do I get my old boyfriend back? I don't want to lose our relationship.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You don't want to be around pot smokers. He does. The relationship is over, already. Sorry.



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What Guys Said 2

  • Sounds like time to draw the ultimatum. Usually I'm all against these, but when it comes to drugs and he's not willing to work on cutting back and now wants you to live with his stoner buddies. You need to see how much HE cares for the relationship. If he doesn't, you need to move on.

  • Don't ever get back with an ex.


What Girls Said 1

  • Lika yaddayadda said, you can't force someone to change. You said you want your "old boyfriend" back but there's one problem with that, your old boyfriend was an illusion. You have two options: accept your boyfriend the way he is or move on and look for someone who's better suited for you.

    Normally I think people make a bigger deal out of marijuana than they should. I personally smoke on a regular basis as does my boyfriend, but we both have good jobs and keep up with our responsibilities. To me, as long as you're still responsible, pot is perfectly fine. However, when people let it get in the way of accomplishing things in their lives, that's a huge problem. And it seems like that's the effect your boyfriend is letting it have on his life. It seems to me like you should just look for a new boyfriend.