How to avoid being awkward on a date from online?

I met this guy online and meeting him for coffee today.

I'm 23 never kissed a guy, and only had three first dates all from an online dating site.

and this has occured before I'll list according the people

Jake- was very awkward to begin with. told me off during the date like you "should accept another offer" when I told him about some weird guy msging. Told me I was too extrovert for him. And kept asking me when I was going to meet my friend and it was getting late. I kept trying to make the conversation go, as it was my first date really ever...and he just made it hard. I shook hands with him at the end of the date lol Then for the rest of the semester I saw him on the express train to my university every morning...yay more awkwardness for me.

Alex- He was shorter than I realized he would be and the day of he (before the date) sent me a few body shot and asked me if I liked them. He was going to university overseas after the summer ended and I felt like he was only looking for a hookup. I hugged him at the end of the date and went on my way as saying my bus was leaving soon. He said he would walk me to the station (15 min away) I said its okay its kind of far.

Matt- He was nice at first. And then after he kept talking I was yawning and drinking coffee. Wasn't really interested I guess it showed because I kept looking elsewhere when he was talking. In the beginning of the date he suggested we go out for a walk after coffee..and it was raining lol and after the date he just goes

"see you around".

I don't think I was particularly attracted to any of them, maybe that's why the dates were so bad. I felt awkward even when I wasn't attracted, a) kept being on my phone during the date- I was nervous-only first two dates listed though

b) last date as I reached for coffee, my hand would shake even though I FELT NOTHING for the guy.

Any ways to make myself less nervous and less awkward during the date, I have like no experience and my friend is telling me to go on this date with the new guy because he seems like someone I would like. He's intelligent, athletic and cute. And now I'm also second guessing myself thinking I'm not good enough ...so yeah help here!


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Relax, smile and take a deep breath. Don't think of it as a date, think of it as a meet-up. You are meeting someone for coffee. The word “date” makes me sweat bullets and get all nervous. But meeting up doesn't, I meet up with my friends all the time. Do you spend any time with guys at all? I used to get super nervous on dates until I started hanging out with my roommate's guy friends (she's bi and an engineer, tons of guys always around). It helped a lot in letting me relax and drop my guard around guys. I also switched up what I did when meeting up with guys I'm interested in. Never do dinner, a movie or coffee... there's so little you can do with that. Do something interactive where you can pull conversation topics from your surroundings. Don't mention other guys, exes, weight, insecurities or medical issues.

    Flirt, talk, touch, laugh and enjoy yourself. Since I've started going about dating like this, I've had such an amazing time. Took some trial and error. The guys will not like me saying this... but I find treating them as friends, not potential boyfriends really helps. I'm not friend-zoning them but thinking about it that way makes it less awkward. I flirt with all my guy friends anyway to the point where people ask if we're dating so its not a big deal for me.

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What Guys Said 2

  • I think you need to relax more. First dates are only 'get togethers', don't take them so personal. Be yourself. You don't need to be the engine to conversations for the date to become successful, if you feel like your the only person talking, then just have a "comfortable silence".

    Dates that constantly talk can drive me nuts. Sometimes I enjoy a moment to myself. Not just dates, but with friends as well.

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  • try & get in your comfort zone. Don't worry about what he will think, just try your best to be yourself. Try & crack a few jokes & be funny too. Whenever I go on these online blind date type things I always start it off with a random joke, and when I can't think of anything I just sing a Maroon five song & they always laugh & feel fine ha. That won't work in every case, but that is just me. Find your most comfortable point though, and make jokes to break the ice. Also, get some coffee or something to make you hyper so you don;t think about it as much. That way if you need a second to think of what to say, just drink your coffee or drink & then continue. Those are my methods. Good luck! Jokes are the best way to break the ice though.

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What Girls Said 3

  • drink a little

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  • dirnk a little before, alcohol helps

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  • drink a shot beofr go to a place you ar ecomfortable in and try to think of him as a frined.

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