He's stopped talking to me out of nowhere

So my ex and I were on good terms for a while and we talked and joked around often.

Over the last few days he has been completely unresponsive. He has an Iphone so I can see that he's read my message late late at night but he never responds. The past couple times, I've gotten nothing including the last message that said it was delivered but never been read.

I remade my profile on POF, the site we originally met on to message him to see what was going on because I know recently, he dropped his phone and broke his screen so I didn't know if he was just unable to recieve texts and that was the issue. He came online but never responded, so I sent another message saying that I wouldn't contact him anymore, that all I wanted was to know why because I was hurt and confused.

Up until now he hasn't given me any inclination as to me bugging him or that he wanted me to leave him alone. I text him maybe once a day or every other day- nothing excessive.

I just don't know what to do, a part of me wants to call and see if I can get a response. All I want to know is what the hell happened because of how suddenly he took off.

Updates:
We've known each other about 8 months
It's the same guy from this question:

link
Well, he ended up messaging me yesterday, via the dating site saying his phone is not functional, and that he's been up at his uncles in central cal.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • He does not want you. He does not want to be with you at all, in any capacity. He does not want to be your friend, he does not want to be your f*ck buddy. Perhaps he finds you annoying, maybe there is someone else, who knows?

    But the point is, if he is not responding, but he's reading the messages and hanging out online and such, he does not want to talk to you, for whatever reason. Just leave him be and move on. I've been there and done that, pretty much this exact thing happened to me not too long ago. Complete with him saying things like "I'll always be here for you to talk to as a friend if you need me" and actually, since both of us knew dating wasn't going to happen, we thought friends with benefits might be a fun idea. Then he didn't respond to my texts, and then I found out not too long after that he blocked me on FB. And the whole situation sucked.

    But ANYONE who decides to ignore you instead of talking to you and telling you the truth and saying "Hey, there's someone else" or "This isn't working out, with us just being friends" or whatever is just an immature d*ck and not worth your time.

    I know it hurts, but you clearly deserve better than him, if he can't even be open and honest with you about your relationship. I'm so sorry this happened, but the best thing for you is to just say "F*CK HIM WHAT AN A**HOLE" and move on.

    Good luck.

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What Guys Said 5

  • You've tried on several occasions to get a reply from him. As I see it, the ball is on his court so it is up to him to decide to respond or not. Some people tend to be real funny regarding exes, as some can maintain a friendship with them but others can't. Maybe he felt at one point you would end up back together, but came to the realization that it isn't going to happen, either by his own choosing or based on something that you said to him.

    Personally, with the history you both have, he owes you at least a reply, even if it is to say that he no longer wishes to stay in communication (just out of common courtesy).

    I can see if he was laid up in a hospital or something, but he's getting online, reading texts, checking profiles, etc, he's just choosing not to reply. There's pretty much nothing you can do at this point but move forward, knowing in your heart, you did try.

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    • He's always been a brutally honest guy, able to tell even people he hates exactly how he feels about them, so I don't know what the deal is with him not being able to even give me a reason.

    • Perhaps he can't face you in light of this particular situation. Its a lot easier to be brutally honest with someone you don't know or know casually. You have a history, short perhaps, but a closeness was developed and he may feel compelled to want to spare your feelings. Maybe his way of letting you down easy is not to talk at all, when in reality it creates limbo and there's no closure because you're left only with speculation, not answers.

  • Generally, it seems that he is not interested. If he was, he'd be making more of an effort to initiate and make sure it doesn't fizzle out, right? Dragging it out like this is prolonging the pain. Do you want more than fooling around? If so, isn't that part of the problem? That you're not satisfied with anything casual in reality, cause you want him back? So aren't you essentially in conflict with reality by going down this road? It seems he wants to go and sleep with other women, to be frank. So the relationship between you and him is not important enough to him to change his decision and behavior , which speaks volumes. I don't know, I can only make assumptions on the basis of this little knowledge. I definitely think you should seek out a definitive answer. Ask to meet him, in person, and tell him outright how you feel. But isn't that risky? Maybe, if you tinker around the edges like this, you at least definitively won't lose him for the time being?

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    • I know I definitely want a relationship with him and that I care about him and had intended on eventually coming clean about wanting more.

  • if you text you will seem clingy if you don't you will seem like you moved on which is what you should have done.

    contacting him will do no good

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  • wait a bit before replying

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  • It means that he was turned off by you or he doesn't like you anymore.

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What Girls Said 4

  • Sounds like he has changed his mind about you. Maybe being "in limbo" with you was still too much work for him so he decided to just cut you out. I don't know, it's difficult to say since I don't know either of you personally or know your history together like you do. If I were you, I'd cool down with the messaging and see if he responds later. If he doesn't, you'll know for sure that he just lost interest and decided to drop you.

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  • Well...he's your ex. Most people don't talk to their exes on a daily basis. He's probably just moved on from you and doesn't see the point in talking every day. Why are you hurt? Do you still have feelings for him?

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    • We sort of had a mutual arrangement to fool around and all that. He still mentioned having feeling for me and that he cared about me and all that.

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    • I know he wants to be single for a while. He graduates in the fall, then he's gonna travel and then plans on coming back to settle down. Hell, a week or 2 ago he was telling me how he's always here for me.

    • Wow, I can understand why you're confused then. Sounds like he doesn't know what he wants. I think you should just let it be for a few days and if he doesn't contact you then you should contact him and ask what's going on.

  • Don't contact him anymore. He is telling you through his actions that he is no longer interested. Move on...

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  • i think he's jsut unsure of having contact with you since you are exes.

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    • But if you read the comments on the answer below yours, we had agreed to fool around and still have fun and we both still cared a lot about each other.

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