I have a friend who's 26, and could get any guy she wants. She has the whole world at her finger tips. Yet, her dating life is almost nonexistent. A similar girl I know is the same way. Beautiful! Smart...self reliant...has it all! Yet she pretty much stays away from the dating scene. I could be interested in girl 2...but not sure if I want to bother with a chick who might be waiting for MR. Perfect to walk up to her. I know some women who are now in their 50's and were very successful, and very hot..yet they were looking for a guy that only existed in their mind. They never married.
Most Helpful Girl
With humbleness I can say I fit the criteria above. :)
Here's my experience, all I personally need in a guy is someone I can have an intellectual conversation with, and be physically attracted to. Other people might have different priorities but it’s same concept. A friend of mine needs someone she can go party with every week (that’s her priority), others might want money or prestige….from my view those other things I can get for myself since as you say I’m smart and pretty.
Since I know that I have "the world at my fingertips"as you said, I don't have to settle down for JUST ANYTHING. The pleasure I get from the attention that people give me is so rewarding that I need to have something that is more rewarding than that attention (which is a guy I’m really attracted to and I can have a convo with) . Being on dates with random people I just met is NOT rewarding, not fun. I need to be around the guy for a period of time until I’m attracted to his personality and his intellect even if we’re not talking yet, seeing him in his daily surrounding helps me get an idea about who he is, and physical attraction starts building up( that can only happen at school or at work =which limits my opportunity of meeting someone). Meeting someone at a club won’t do it, unless we really hit it off at first sight (very rare to happen) These things need time, and our life style doesnot give us that time. People who settle down just take any opportunity.
Social factors: Social life is almost nonexistent in the US, for my purposes (being around someone for a while). One reason why the girl might not be involved.
Personal factors: even though I’m socially outgoing, I’m shy on a personal level, you won’t know that until you get to know me, so when I like someone (which is once in a while I fail to show the person my attraction).
So in short, we’re not looking for Mr right, we’re just looking for someone who will add value to our life. You might add value to our life, if you’re caring (truly love us), may be you’re funny and will mak us laugh, if you’re highly educated you might teach us stuff….all you need is one characteristic that will add that value to our life. Even if you don’t have anything at all, your genuine attention adds value to our life(which most guys don’t know)
If you really like this girl, build a rapport with her and ask her out, because you might just be the guy who will add value to her life. These women who never got married, were never married because guys were intimidated by them and did not approach probably not because they didnot wanna be with the guys who did not approach them.
this is a broad topic with many factors, I hope my humble reply helps.1
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